PART 2

My last post created lot of confusion, as I didnt write it clearly,It was not about independent people but about those who are dependent  or live with their children so I want to say here now very categorically
I love the people who maintain themselves and live well and are active and live life well.I admire them.
I was talking about
this tendency of reminiscing about their youth and its flirtations, and exaggerating the importance they got from opposite sex:).......talking about which looks very ridiculous at this age..atleast to me.I can never talk to my children or even my sisters and tell them that i was so popular among boys etc etc, I find it embarrassing. and feel that they are not so important topics now, as life has much more to offer.

My second point was about the DEPENDENT older crowd that most of the people find old people's plight very pitiable and bad, but do old people make any effort to make life better for their young children.and most of the problems can be solved with a little different attitude to life.If all women love their DILs and care for them when they enter their family, they will get if not hundred percent, but I am pretty sure atleast  50 percent return will be there..but then when its time to do, nobody wants to do anything, but when its their time to take, they are ready to take from both hands. And a good life comes to givers not takers.

In the old age also  elders are so demanding ,..Even if they have always taken the best of culinary delights.now they must be accommodating and partake everything with pleasure.simple food is good for their health also, but I see that whatever they couldnt get in their youth even, they want it now.

May be they had a very hectic social life in their prime, but now do whatever the situation demands..One cant tag along the children everywhere, or make your own separate circle and socialise with them, dont ever try to dominate your children's friend circle.

May be you were very fond of travelling and sight seeing, but now do it if you are able to to do it on your own,If children take you anywhere, bless them, but otherwise too dont feel bad, we can see so many things without going anywhere too if we put our minds to them.and we must try to see thru our children's eyes.and find our happiness in the family.

Elders get respect if they are generous with their mind , not only with their age, but if they behave according to the age...and its children's duty also to see that their parents are comfortable, well looked after,and make them feel a part of their life,not a liability.What happens is that everyone wants to do the best for  children and least for the parents( not true for all) and this is the way life circle goes on.

I will end this year with this quote....

Be always at war with your vices, at peace with your neighbors, and let each New Year find you a better man.
- Benjamin Franklin

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

AGEING GRACEFULLY

I have seen that most of the women when they cross 50 start thinking about their past and reminiscing about their youth. Now you are going to say that being nostalgic is so common to everybody, past always seems to be better..no. but here comes the catch:)..they remember more about the crushes, who were the boys after them(or they were after them?), how popular they were( even if nobody liked them:). And today if anybody wants to maintain friendship and if the person is from the opposite gender, then its their attraction which is still working.....some go to the length to exaggerate, how much they are liked in society and by others.

What is the thought process behind it? is it the fear of growing old? or growing unattractive? or some complex is growing inside of feeling unwanted?

I have always felt that appreciation and praise if any should come from others..blowing your own trumpet is so ..not very appealing ?
Secondly if people age gracefully and behave accordingly, neither they are neglected nor look unattractive. Because after a certain age, nobody looks at your clothes or figure or jewellery, but your deeds.and your heart. And a good heart always reflects on your face and brings dignity to it..One must take pride not in physical appearances or materialistic things, but in being compassionate and kind.
Just the other day some one was telling me..that aged people face many problems, I said..true, but most of them are because of their attitude towards life.My feeling is that....with age we must look inward,instead of indulging and desiring everything young people do,because we bring misery to us, as well as our family.Yes if one is physically and financially sound, and can manage his/ her indulgence, fine do it, but never do it at the cost of bringing problems in other's life,be it your children or other family memebrs.Instead we must be satisfied with little and devote ourselves to society and god.God has given us four stages of life.

In our child hood we indulge and parents pamper us.first 20 years
In our youth we work hard to make our life..next 20 years
Now we enjoy the fruit of our labour..next 20 years
Now is the time to give back to society and others, and our aim should be to give,  to do and make others happy.

AKSHAYA NAVY QUEEN BALL

Just the other day I saw an advertisement for Navy ball and decided to  go there.Whenever I see the people from forces, I stand in awe at their grooming..what discipline and style they have !!very admiring ! This function was so systematic When i heard that there would be around1000 people, I was apprehensive that may be there would we too much of crowd in a cramped place or may be a long queue for food, and ultimately food may be short too..and all that. But nothing of the sort. It was planned in a huge space where all the people were assigned a table and coupons were given for drinks and food. and no lines anywhere.
In the show for entertainment there were belly dancers from Russia and laser shows, both were very good. In the three laser shows best one was where they showed how this navy day came into existence.from 71 war...that time  Navy had helped the country get an awesome victory.
When I saw the girls who participated in the pageant , I realised how much work must be being done by Femina people who organise them. Because here  Except the three girls woh won, rest all were just not prepared at all...they were total raw, and so nervous that they looked like beauty( I am not even sure about that though) without brains.
Food was catered by Ambasador Pallava, I dont know this hotel and now I dont even want to know:). For vegetarians, neither there was variety nor taste .It was a great opportunity for them to publicise themselves , but they botched it up all.

The judges were P Vasu, Chitti Babu,Renuka David, Rekha Menon, and Mrs, Girhotra.

Can we do it?

In the response to my last post everyone said that it is best if one does what one likes, but is that really ever possible in life? I dont think so. Its not that we always want to do the right things, we may desire so many things, which may not be proper to do and if we do that may be we would be ruining all our relationships and then could we be happy after that.? Life cant be lived for a few moments of happiness.its along term thing.
It all reminded me that once my son gave me a card with the matter.......what can I give you.may be  Ican wish you to have. the freedom to do what you want , freedom to do as you want..I loved that card so much that I have treasured it for last 6 years. Because yes that freedom is the greatest thing, but even he cant give me that because if ever I do something which he or his wife dont like he is wont to ask me..mom how can you do it:)
I know we cant live life with complete abandon as we are social animals, but sometimes I feel that in a year .a month must be given to everyone to live freely without any restrictions( to me restrictions never mean doing anything immoral or illegal.) that is.. sleeeping, whenever you want without worrying about making breakfast lunch and dinner, eating whatever you fancy without worrying about calories and living with the people you want to......
what do you think?

ADJUSTMENT AND JUGAAD

I read about adjustment and Jugad at one fellow blogger's post and when I thought of adjustment, it reminded me a very old story I read long back may be 20 years back but even today one identify with this.here is the synopsis of that...

Aparna was married to Shyam with lot of fan fare. Shyam was a very loving and caring husband and she was very happy with him.But his mother was a typical MIL who never wanted to leaver her hold on his son.So Shyam asked her to be polite and respectful to his mother whereas he will do everything otherwise to make her happy. WHenever Shyam went somewhere and brought 2 sarees for two most important women in his life, it was his mother who chose first and he then consoled Aparna saying..she is immature, but you are mature, let her take it, you can adjust, after all she is not going to be with us forever(though she outlived Shyam) and life went on. She had a son, who grew up to be a fine young man and a caring and loving son.
She married the son the with  a girl of his choice, and now whenever he brought anything it was his wife who chose first and his son always said..amma you are the most understanding mother and mature too, she is immature, let her take it...
It left her pondering..was she born mature? is it a crime to be flexible and understanding? and in the end she decided to live independently and do what SHE wanted to do, instead of being mature and understanding all the time..Finally she was free of adjustments.
This story touched me so much that I could never forget it, because I have seen it that whosoever adjusts more, is always suppressed more..its the vocal and uncouth who get the upper hand in life. Does that mean that we must stop adjusting?......I dont know actually ....I think adjustment should be from both sides,one sided maturity or understanding never brings love and harmony in relationships.
Most of the women  complain about inlaws asking them to cook for whole family and do all the chores single handedly and do the job also,I can say for myself that I did everything as a DIL too and I do as a MIL too and there I dont have any complaints even,because for inlaws I thought it was my duty and I could never shirk from my duty and for children I love to do everything.

DAILY CONVERSATION BETWEEN HUSBAND AND WIFE

Husband: aaj khane mein kya banaogi?..(.What will you cook today for dinner)
Wife: Jo aap kaho..whatevr you want
H: Dal chawal bana lo..make rice and lentil
W: Abhi kal hi to khaye the...but you ate them yesterday only
H: to sabji roti bana lo..then cook some vegetables
W: bacche nahi khayenge.....Kids dont eat that
H: to chhole puri bana lo..then cook  chhole poori
W: mujhe heavy heavy lagta hai..
H:  eggs bhurji bana lo...
W: aaj guruvaar hai..Today is thursday
H: paraanthe?
W: raat ko paraanthe kaun khata hai??..who eats parantha at night?
H: Hotel se mangwa lete hain?..then we can order from Hotel.
W: roz roz hotel ka nahi khana chahiye. hotel food shouldnt be eaten frequently.
H: kadhi chawal?
W: dahi nahi hai..no curd
H: idly sambar?
W: usme time lagega.pehle bolna chahiye tha na!!....its time consuming..you should have told earlier.
H: Soup hi bana lo, usme time nahi lagega.....then soup is enough, wont take time evn.
W: woh koi meal thodi hai? Pet nahi bharta..soup is not a meal, and not filling.
H: phir ab kya banaogi?.now what will you cook?
W: wo jo aap kaho .whatevr you want.
This I got in email..since it was in Hindi, wherevr I found necessary I have tranlated in English.

Koffee with karan

Last week suddenly i had to make a trip to Hyderabad and what a pleasure it was.weather was so good over there and i realised that how much the mother tongue means to everyone. I felt so good that i could talk in Hindi and when I went to Fresh..lovely Hindi movie songs were being played, and I enjoyed so much that just loitered around.

Koffee with Karan season 3 has started and I watched a few episode and liked that new generation stars are not so diplomatic.When Deepika and Sonam put Ranbeer down for his sex appeal, so much noise was made, but when Ranbir and Imran put Sonam and Deepika last in acting and looking sexy , nobody batted an eye.I didnt understand why. But for Salman, stars are high now .a days, Dabang is the biggest grosser of all times and he is the top most search ( in Bollywood) at Google also  and then everybody  at KWK praised him and chose him most of the times over Sharukh.I am happy for that.

Now a days I am reading a book by Dr. Sunny Satin..Incerdibly believable..The Shift...its quite interesting and says that by 2012 the world will start changing and by 2029 we will have a new age where all the corruption and maladies of today will disappear.and its all scientific as earth's vibrations will change and become higher. And I was surprised because last week only my sister told me that her guru also told the same thing that by 2012 things will start changing, and people will start behaving in the right way instead of being selfish and self centered

India versus abroad

Recently a blogger friend sm wrote here a post about the advantages and disadvantages of coming back to India..initially I didnt agree but it made me think and here is what I think......

Advantages in living abroad.....

1. the biggest I find is money, Indian money has no value, there the same calibre person can earn enough to live well and still have expendable money, here even qualified well placed people also cant have that freedom with money..of course now things are changing as both the spouses are working here.
2. Infrastructure and governance.there one doesnt have to run door to door for getting things done and then ultimately grease the palms.
3. many people cite job satisfaction also, but I think politics is everywhere, may be here it is more.
4. Less pollution.
5. One doesnt have to look after day to day guests and other family responsibilities and as is the trend in India:) people living abroad get more respect and awe even from the relatives without doing anything, and so they are forgiven everything. I remember once I had a neighbour who used to say...my brother comes in five years and gives a chq of 1000 dollars to my mother and she keeps singing his praises, and here I am who looks after her daily and must be spending a lot , so I who is doing everything physically and financially and taking her responsibility is nothing..and he used to be very bitter about it...I wouldnt take it as an advantage if I am abdicating my duties but for some people it is.
6. Education has better access.

Advantages of living here .....

1. One feels at home.
2. we can bring up our children with our culture..now I know that many youngsters themselves dont want to follow discipline, but believe me once children come everybody comes on this earth and realises the value of traditions and customs.
3. One thing I agree with sm that whatever people might say but nobody comes back for parents or family.Its a bitter truth that whatever children might say, nobody changes his life course due to parents, they do only what they can after making their life. Once in 80's   I met a young manwho was the only son of his parents and he always used to blame his parents for ruining his life, as they didnt allow him to go abroad and he was struggling here(in his eyes)..Then only I decided that I will never stop my children from going anywhere. Sometimes I feel sad when I see very old parents living alone, but then how many DILs are there who make their inlaws happy if they live together, so may be it is ok living independently.
4. One gets help for domestic chores.
5. we get our own type of food.
6. Medically also I feel more comfortable here, though not many people will agree with me.

 I would like you to add to my list.......

I AM SORRY......

Pencil: I'm sorry.... Eraser: For what? You didn't do anything wrong. Pencil: I'm sorry cos you get hurt bcos of me. Whenever I made a mistake,   you're always there to erase it. But as you make my mistakes vanish, you   lose a part of yourself. You get smaller and smaller each time. Eraser: That's true. But I don't really mind. You see, I was made to do this.  I was made to help you whenever you do something wrong. Even though one day,  I know I'll be gone and you'll replace me with a new one, I'm actually happy with   my job. So please, stop worrying. I hate seeing you sad. :) I found this conversation between the pencil and the eraser very inspirational.   Parents are like the eraser whereas their children are the pencil. They're always   there for their children, cleaning up their mistakes. Sometimes along the way...  they get hurt, and become smaller (older, and eventually pass on). Though their   children will eventually find someone new (spouse), but parents are still happy  with what they do for their children, and will always hate seeing their precious ones worrying, or sad. This is for all parents out there.....

TAG FROM LALITHA

THE "IF" Tag.....I have been away from the blog for long and for multiple reason, about them in my next post, I start again with this very unique tag..I was tagged by Starry long back, so here I am...


If I were a month.....It has to be February,the weather is so pleasant, that I always plan some vacation at that time.


If I were a day of the week....I would pick a sunday, as I love to have morning tea with leisure, which I cant otherwise, and this is the only day one can spend without any restrictions, as you want it.

If I were a time of day.... I am a morning person totally, I am always full of energy and waiting to do so many things....

If I were a season....It has to be autumn, with the foliage changing colors..nothing is so beautiful as the changing colors of nature.

If I were a planet...I  would like to be sun who always gives and brings sunshine in other's lives..


If I were a sea animal...I would be a fish who could fill someone's stomach.


If I were a direction....I would be north.( I am a north Indian na:)


If I were a piece of furniture....It would be a futon, a multipurpose item, one can lie, relax or sit.

If I were a liquid.....it has to be water..life elixir:)


If I were a tree....would be a coconut tree which is used fully.be the fruit,stem or leaves.


If I were a tool....a paint brush, which could color a canvas.

If I were an element....Being a woman it would have to be Gold.


If I were a gemstone......Neelam, which either brings luck or destruction, nothing midway.


If I were a musical instrument....I love the rhythym of Dholak, and thas the reason I like O P Nayyar's music.



If I were a color.....it has to be white..so pure...

If I were a emotion.....It would have to be Joy.

If I were a fruit...It would have to be a banana.complete food.


If I were a sound...It would have to be the sound of flute.brings such serenity in mind.


If I were a car..... it would have to be aTata safari..I like that one:)

If I were food.......it would have to be rice, because I love rice and I think it is a food widely available and feeds a lot of people, the rich and the poor.

If I were a taste.....It would have to be sweet.I have a sweet tooth and love sweets
.

If I were a scent....It would have to be Jasmine.I love the smell of jasmine

If I were a pair of shoes.....It should be some kolhapuri with diamante.

If I were a bird....It would have to be an eagle,to soar across the skies .


I am going to tag SG, Bikramjit,Chitra,uptake,Enigma,AmritaMadhu and Deeps.

Learning

I have an acquaintance who is very principled person and he was telling me that his son is also like him and cant tolerate indiscipline even, once he was standing in a queue and as is usual, another man tried to go ahead saying he was in a hurry.His son told him that all the people standing patiently in a queue are not without any work, they are also in a hurry, but following a discipline.That man was wearing good clothes and speaking English, so by his appearance a third person says that...see  even educated people behave like this this..so his son said.......not educated, education brings a character in a person..( even oxford dictionary states this)..he may be literate, but we cant call him educated, and the other person was quite amazed and said so that he never ever thought like that, though this is the truth.And this incident reminded me of one of my post where I also said the same thing that in India anyone who speaks English, is considered educated well, even some may call him learned also.whereas another one who may be highly accomplished but doesnt know English is not so revered.....
And this slave mentality is affecting us in other areas also,anything from the west is good..if they have all the freedom we must also get it,West has so many good qualities, but we are copying the worst only and the results will be known in the next decade, when we would have got all the money but without any peace or values or family.

CONTINUED

In the comment section Bikram wrote about his cousins calling him Veerji and listening to what he says..these are the values I think everybody must learn. In our times, I called all my sister.inlaws and brotherinlaws, even if they were younger to me with..didi and bhaiya and reason being that is the way to start learning to love and respect them. All my hubby's friends used to call me bhabhi.and in this there was lot of respect towards their friend's wife. Earlier everybody was given some relation like this because that way we could maintain a decorum in that relationship , but today people calling bhabhis are considered backward, as calling with names sounds cool..but then there is no boundary also, thats why one finds so many affairs etc.not that we didnt have them earlier, but still ..there was some hesitation. Today we want everybody to be friendly.be it parent,inlaws others..but can friendship really replace all relations?..why do we want everyone to be friends only? dont we have enough friends?.....To me it seems as if no one wants to do any efforts to maintain any relation, and friendship seems to be the easiest thing to do..though I dont think it is easy to have good friends, but then when we have good friends we say..they are like family..what does it mean?..
Just like people say that ...DIL is like a daughter to me..
my MIL is like a mother..
My daughters are like son to me..
But I would say that..
Why not love you dil as a DIL only..because daughter is totally different, nobody can   be like her, but one can love another person also in her own role if she is good to you.
Same MIL can never be your mother, Mothers take every thing from their daughters even trash and you can take them for granted,but with MIL one has to have certain courtesy, and show some respect and restrain, otherwise your relationship is doomed.
And last one, though people say it to show their love to their daughters, I feel there cant be anything more insulting than this...why not love your children just like that?

Discipline

Today I saw many pictures in the newspaper about children being initiated into learning..VIDYARAMBHAM..as is the tradition here but surprised to see that first alphabet being taught was A,I thought it would be their own.
NOW the biggest and most enjoyable festival is in the offing and it pleases me no end to see the ads in newspapers everyday..makes my day festive. This year Diwali is special to me as my son and DIL will be with me. When he was young I used to tell him, that stay wherever you want, but make it a point to come home on Diwali, but practically it is not possible.To me Diwali pooja is very auspicious and I would love it if I have my children with me, but due to the traditions I am unable to desire the presence of my daughter and just miss her all the time. Now a days when I am cleaning the home to welcome Lakshmi, I miss her so much,she  brings so much of pleasure with her presence, I feel so much at peace, and there is nothing impossible, if I am tired she will do it,.... sometime I rue the traditions....
 Yesterday i was talking to someone about children upbringing, and everybody had the opinion that todays parents are bringing up their children with a total disregard for etiquette's and discipline. May be since they didnt get that type of freedom and pampering, they want to give their children all that, but the result is disastrous.Children dont greet the guests, eat whatever they want and whenever they want, are not courteous to neighbours and not thankful for small gifts.Discipline and hard work is the key to success in life, so never replace them and always remember to bring up responsible citizens, evolved humans with kindness in their heart and respect for fellow citizens.Encourage delayed gratification than instant one.

Handicrafts

Craft Council Of India is running an exhibition of different things at Valluvar kottum..Chennai till 17th.I keep track of all handicraft exhibitions and make a point to see them and buy something from there.Its our duty to save our rich heritage, unless we  support them these ancient arts will vanish. And yesterdays outing was a complete delight.they had so many good things over there, so I bought  quite a few, instead of token things..bamboo mats,silk cushions, kota saree, venkatgiri suit material..directly from the weaver and some more material from jaipur.I urge you all whoa re in Chennai to atleast go there and see.
Yesterday we went to a very old Kali temple in Parry's..this Parry's was named after a company and today most of the people pronounce it as Paris:)..This temple is very old.some 500 years, it was on the beach,later on shifted here.It has certain divine feel, now-a-days Navraatri is going on and since me and my husband fast for 9 days, we want to so much to visit some durga temple, so yesterday's visit was a blessing to me.I felt so happy there and regretted that I coudnt take any prasad from there(as we partake only selected food now-a-days.)..I dont keep a nirjal fast or something similar, I would rather that i am able to maintain this tradition of mine, so we take milk and fruits and food only one time a day.I have seen many people who will keep an strict fast and then wouldnot like to anything in the house, but, I from the beginning maintained the normal routine of my home, nobody would feel any inconvenience due to my fast:) and I cook and work evrything as usual:)

Last week I saw Karthik calling Karthik...it has a very unique story line with the schizophrenic Hero, but they goofed up with the selection of Farhan Akhtar, he just messed up the movie..if it was made with some good actor..would have been lovable, Deepika Padukon is the only delight in an otherwise a slow movie. In scenes where simple Farhan changes into an smart one, he looks more like a villain than a hero, and change is not much visible even physically, I remembered..CHOTI SI BAAT where a simple Amol Palekar changes into an smart one with so much of endearing and cute style. 
Yesterday when I switched on the TV..Fir Wahi Dil Laya Hoon.was being aired on SAB TV and I just loved it..old movies have such a simple story line with lots of foot tapping musice and melodies, beautiful heroine romancing a handsome dude, and they live happily ever after..my idea of true entertainment, may not be path breaking, but fun to watch on sunday evening, now I will have to get the songs of this movie, otherwise I have the music from most of those old romantic movies:)..so relaxing to listen to that:)

WISHING YOU ALL A VERY HAPPY NAVRAATRI AND VIJAYA DASHMI!!!

FROZEN THOUGHTS

Recently our association has started a library in the premises and I have volunteered for their work as library is my favourite place.Earlier in early 80's also I was looking after a library and I read so many good and rare books there, then in next decade I ran my own library and now this. Just looks like god always takes care of our interests.

Here I came to know about a magazine..Frozen thoughts..I never saw it earlier, but this is an amazing one with unique ideas and very interesting too.First one i read, then I wanted  to quote so many things, then I thought that this way i would be quoting a full magazine.So i will share few thoughts which I liked...

First that why we keep our priorities vertically, why not horizontally, because few things in life are equally important, nothing more , nothing less. Like I keep getting mails saying that family is more important than career or job, but i dont agree with that.Its job only which keeps the family happy and one survives due to job only. Earning makes our relationships also much better.So many things become easier when one is in a job which satisfies him/her financially and professionally. A happy person can keep the family also happy.Our day to day survival depends on the money earned, so one must never ignore the career.

Second one is that so many times we listen..see that doctor is very nice person..that teacher is so cordial with the children...her parents are so friendly.....his boss is very sweet and kind hearted.
.but we need a good doctor, not a nice person. We must always go to a doctor who is good in his profession, being nice may be his secondary quality not the first one.
And a teacher must be knowledgeable and good in teaching first, then cordial.
Parents should do well as parents  first and look after their children's welfare,character,education,manners everything and then be friendly.
And seniors need to see that work is done,if they let the dead wood remain there, they are harming the organisation and cant be termed good.
What i mean to say first do efficiently what is your prime responsibilities, then try to excel in others.and the same thing applies to relationship...
Children must learn to respect the parents first, and then comes caring and loving.
Parents must inculcate values in children, polish them and then try to be friendly.

and whatever the boundaries everywhere should be maintained, one must never cross that.

Daughters

This sunday was daughters day...for the first time I came to know this through newspaper only.I dont believe in the days, but daughters sure are a blessings.I remember that earlier few of my friends had only daughters, so they used to envy me for my son, but today when all our children are settled, they are also living themselves and so are we.. as whether son or daughter, today everybody goes out for a job and parents always live by themselves. And in someways it is good too, as they get their freedom and looking at the girls today I think it wont be a merry ride living together.
I have never believed in the usual thinking that girls are more caring or sons are less, I think children are children and they love their parents equally, just their expressions are different. Secondly girls bring more affection and peace to family because their spouse are cool about it and  most of the girls parents also never want to rock their boat, but with boys it is not so.and then with SILs  one doesnt have much expectations also.Since DILs are given an important place in the house..of grihalakshmi, they get some responsibilities and when they dont conform, family is heart-broken.
I am blessed with a daughter who is so perfect and she has raised the bar so high in our family that every boy wants a girl like her:). When she was young, I was so possesive of her, that I used to say..even if she is married, nobody can claim any right on her, she will always remain MY daughter...and today I feel so childish, but she was more mature than me.She always had her priorities right in her life, I feel so proud of her for embracing another family with an open heart and assimilating her self so well.I wouldnt have been so proud, if she had remained my daughter only..because thats not growth..as life goes forward, one has to evolve.And I get so much of appreciation from everybody whosever comes in contact with her.Instead of she herself shouting..my mommy is best,it feels good when others say that:)
A mother's pride to me lies in bringing up a girl who brings happiness to everyone and herself.Who is polite to everyone,and compassionate to unprivileged and environment.and hardworking.Sometimes she surprises me with her maturity and perseverance and her attiude to work and whenever I ask her to relax, she says..ma you always used to say that hard work never killed anybody..and she has imbibed everything I taught her so well.
Blessed are those who have daughters and lucky are the people like me who get one like her.

Effects of marriage

AmritaTagged me  by asking :-
A question to all my blog buddies. You can answer anonymously, in case you`re uncomfortable. But do answer.

Has marriage killed the girl in you?
Are you more programed, more regulated in your thoughts and deeds?
Or are you simply calmer? Assuaged?
Are you still in love?
Or are you simply loving? Caring, fond and loyal..?

What does marriage do to you?

Since the journey of my marriage has been a long one.to be precise 35 years,it will take me some real thought to think about it.....Has marriage changed me..yes in some ways, I was the one famous listener, and marriage to a totally same type of person turned me to become a talker:)...Otherwise our home would be a silent era. And in many other things I have grown as a person, since i got married very young, I was an impulsive,hyper ,rigid and righteous to the extent of being very adamant. To me everything was in black and white, grey never existed, now I think its most of the grey, I am still righteous, but have learned to be flexible.But I was very naive, and even today when I see girls being so manipulative, saying something and doing the other thing, I wonder, do they teach this also in colleges today. I always say what is in my heart,even living with inlaws hasnt changed my mindset, I cant manipulate people.

Marriage nevr killed the girl inside me, rather  I bloomed...all the things I couldnt do before marriage, I did after ..like watching all the movies in hall:) and learned so many things, as my life partner always encouraged me and supported me in all my hobbies.

Dont know whether I should term it as programming, but yes after marriage one learns to do something for others also. I do many things, just because they make my hubby happy..all the time I cant think what is making me happy..its always family.I have always put my family first than me, so none of my ambitions or ego, nothing comes before them. And I have learned to take everything in my stride..plus and minuses both.like earlier in my life I couldnt do many things due to the constraints of finances, then children and their education, and today because of my old MIL,but thats a part of life, when I enjoy all the privileges my husband provides, then I must take the responsibility also willingly...I know of few girls who enjoy the privileges citing it as their luck, but dont want to take responsibilities

Love means different feelings for different people, and to me its never unconditional,,because I dont think I could love my husband if he didnt care for me, so its always reciprocal, and in arranged marriage it grows with time..as a different understanding comes.I have been conditioned to the thinking that marriages are forever, so the moment I completed my Saptpadi, I was bound to him in a sacred bond which I could never think otherwise, and we have certainly matured with time..both of us, I just wish that we had this insight earlier:)
Being disloyal, never even came to my mind,I cant even think of it, nothing could ever tempt me, I told you I am a very righteous person.To me strength of character is the first quality one must have, and this is what i have inculcated in my children too.

Marriage has given me two wonderful children who give me maximum pleasure and pain:).....and a partner who may have many priorities in life, but i am very important to him and he to me.Life is never perfect but it is good.

I wouldnt say that journey has been full of pleasure only, it had its own ups and downs, but I am happy that we managed them and reached where we are today.

PEEPLI LIVE

This movie has generated so much of interest that it was a must for a movie addict like me to see it..asnd thats what I did:)..............................This is about two brother..farmers who cant pay loan to thebank, and when the bank decides to auction their land they go to a landlord for some loan. He makes fun of them and then one of his aid says that he has heard about a scheme of govt where govt sanctions one lakh ruppess to the farmer's family if he commits suicide.And when they are not able to find any respite from anywhere, elder brother manipulates younger one to do suicide..and from here the drama starts.how English channel people first deride rural news, then once they air, all others follow and be it channels, ministers or local politicians, everybody wants to get a mileage out of it, nobody is bothered either about farmers or the person's life,his family.Itas a great comment on our media, govt and police.
First half is very good, but second half just stretches, may be because story line is very thin.Actors have raised this movie above par...and best is Omkar.one who is going plans to commit suicide and then their mother's dialogues are superb..so natural.And his wife, she is excellent in her portrayal of a no nonsense person who may be poor but is prudent.

But this movie clearly shows how big names association helps a movie.

ISHQIYA:...in the last year, there has been a spurt in movies with rural back ground, not that I am complaining, they deserve it too, as our majority lives there.This is the movie about two small town thieves.Naseeruddin shah and Arshad warsi, who cant pay a loan to Nasser's BIL and they are given 15 days time to recover. They find a refuge in the house of Varma(illegal arms dealer)'s house.His wife.Vidya Balan attracts both and then involves them in kidnapping an owner of steel factory who was associated with her husband and then everything goes wrong.......
They have absorbed the ambiance of eastern UP very well, and language reminds me of my hometown so much:)...Arshad Warsi is good, but I was disappointed with Naseeruddin shah, he is my favourite actor, but here he is lack lustre. Its Viday Balan who is excellent, she has done the role with a great abandon....
All in all movie is just OK,not very entertaining  in the first half.

Sleepless in Seattle...This one is so much like Indian movies where a man marries an unknown girl:), liked it for the child and Tom Hank who is looking so innocently handsome.

Curious case of Benjamin button.....very good and has a totally unique story.

Few Good Men....I saw Shaurya also, but Tom cruise and Demi Moore are much more impressive than Rahul bose and Minisha Lamba.


Disclosure...its Indian adaptation Aitraaz is much better, actors and otherwise both..Akshay, Kareena and Priyanka..this trio looked good.

Sixth Sense...Very good, the child and Bruce Willis both and entertaining too...Indian Adaptation.Hum Tum aur Ghost was also good.

Family

last week I went to meet one of my friend, she is a retired professor, but still keeps studying something,like social welfare etc. In the talks she told me that there had been a survey that rate of divorce is increasing in India by leaps and bounds.And in the discussions she says...Renu I have seen that all the relationships face some problems sometime or the other.But when young couple has some strife, men mostly keep it to themselves, and women, most of the time turn to their friends who are their peer group, in the same age group and facing the same problems sometimes and so their suggestions may not be very constructive or unbiased or even able to solve. Instead if they turn to someone senior who has been through that route and in the position to say.....been there done it, may be they can find some solace and some really good adviceand save the family.
This reminded me how young girls react to some little things even...

OMG...you are such a good cook, you are superb...
Or..You are looking so beautiful, just like aishwarya:)

I have seen that most of the time friends keep complimenting the friends, sometimes over complimenting...I know that appreciating others is a good quality and all that but when there is no genuineness, it brings disaster.because continuous friend's compliments make a person conceited, and when someone from a family has a genuine problem with them they dont take it in a right way, I have heard it from many people....

Outside everybody loves and respects me so much, its only my family who doesnt understand my value.

But these people never look inwards...and always put the blame on family for that.
Outsiders behave like that because...
it is social grace,
They meet you only for a short time,
In that period one is always on one's best behaviour.
And we also always do our best for outsiders,we speak to them nicely, never rudely, we go out of the way to be nice to them, if we call somebody we cook special foods for them , in fact work hard to maintain that image.
Whereas we take the family for granted, we dont make any efforts to be nice to them or please them and we are sometimes even rude to them.
and thats the reason in different perceptions,If the way we behave to outsiders, we follow those principles for our family, our life will be much more happier.

God Will not ask you......

1. God wont ask you what kind of car you drove. He will ask you how many people you drove who didnt have any transportation.
2. God wont ask you the square footage of your house.He will ask you how many people you welcomed into your house.
3. He wont ask you about the clothes you had in your closet. He will ask you how many people you helped to clothe.
4. God will not ask you what your highest salary was. He will ask you if you compromised your character to get it.
5. God wont ask you what your job was.He will ask you did you do it to your best and gave it your best.
6. God wont ask you how many friends you had. He will ask you to how many people you were friend with.
7. God wont ask you in which neighbourhood you liuved.He will ask you how you treated your neighbour.
8. God wont ask you about the colour of your skin,He will ask you about the content of your character........

So learn what is important.

Source..email

My take on some movies...

Badmaash Company...I liked this movie main for its punchline..that if a person is intelligent and Sharp mind, then if he puts it in the right direction, then only he can lead a happy life...Otherwise he is doomed..sooner or later destiny will catch up with him..And then its quite entertaining also..Shahid as usual entertains and looks good, Anushka is Ok in acting, but lacks in looks.Veer and Chang are OK.Rest of the cast...Anupam kher..looks too old, Kiran Sippy and Pawan Malhotra just do their job.But all in all its entertaining.

My Name is Khan....This movie confirms that kajol is one of her kind, she just lights up the screen and I enjoyed those parts only where she is present, plus music is good.Why all retarded people are shown to walk with a stoop?

Well Done Abba:.very unique..with Hyderabdi back ground..this is a satire on our government, where even Babdis(ponds), can be stolen...this is a good movie and grows on you slowly..Boman Irani.everybody knows is good and so is Illa arun, But here Minisha Lamba and Sameer Dattani score .they are excellent and I liked Ravi Kishen....movie with a message and an entertainer too.

Once Upon A time...Main thing I didnt like about this movie is that they have tried to show a criminal like a robinhood..this is not acceptable to me..in most of the movie, they dont show that part of life from where these criminals get the money to do all these so called good deeds, and they dont show where they are hurting the country and its residents..I prefer the movies like Ab tak Chappan etc.
If one is so good at heart, then why be a criminal, why not be a common man and help the people.
.Ajay Devgan looks a  good don, this type of role suits hime well,but Kangna is looking fabulous, she is the highlight of this movie. Imraan Hashmi is his usual self, Prachi Desai seems to be clearly uncomfortable in this bold role..

Aisha:..Very light movie, and an entertainer, with designer settings and clothes.Abhay deol and Sonam Kapoor both look good.Loved this song..mithi mithi.Its about Sonam, who always tries to set the pairs by her own choice and parameters, but it doesnt happen in life that way..love is natural and none knows where it may happen..and she learns it by her own love.
Saw many more...

Tag from G and Hipgrandma

I was tagged by Hiphopgrandmom for seven unknown facts about me and kind of same thing by G and tag from g says.....

Here are the rules of the tag.

1) You have to tag 7 people.

2) You have to link their pages in your tag post

3) You have to leave a comment in their comments section telling them they've been tagged.

4) You have to say who tagged you.

I dont think till now there will be anything unknown about me to my friends, as i always write everything very frankly But still tag is a tag and to me its always a honour to do them  and so here I am:)

1. I have joined the maximum no. of hobby classes like..shorthand,typing,dance,hawaain guitar, enterpreneural course etc..some I completed and some left midway:)
2. I am all the time observing and analysing the beahviour of all the people.if he did so why did he do it? and all that crap:)
3. Though i look a very strong person, but i have been  exploited by my all sometime or other, as I am a emotional fool.hopefully now I have learnt a lesson.
4. I cant stand lies and I am not a very sweet talker too, rather I am a doer...I always show my love through my deeds, not my words.
5. I feel very put off by the people who give all the importance in life to clothes jwellery and food...to me life is beyond that too.....
6. I work better under pressure....without it, I get complacent.
7. If I am doing something, I want my helpers to be just that without any interference, but when I am working under someone, then I am a  very good assistant too, I just dont like crossing the boundaries in whatever you do.Be hundred percent in whatevr you do..leader or follower.

Now I would like to tag...
Shruti, Amrita,jayshree,Baldguy,Manju,Nisha and Deepa

Shall we judge?

Most of the time when I read  my blogger friends, I feel like saying so much in their comment section, but then I think instead of blocking their column, why not put your views on your own blog. So most of my posts are reactions..reaction to some news, reaction to other posts or someone's behaviour:)
As I was reading G, I realised that i have seen many people judging others on very trivial things...

If someone can speak English....he/ she is very intelligent ,way above in society and all that......But I have always disagreed because English is a language and it makes us multilingual to know it, and it has nothing to do with any other accomplishment.

Clothes...though it is said that clothes define a man, but i could say its only first impression, once you start knowing the person, clothes are immaterial...We dont care for anyone for the way he/she dresses, we love people for what they are inside.But many people give respect to dress also..initially without knowing the credentials if they see two people, they always veer towards the better dressed one.The same way as some have bias against complexion..a person should be fair to be called beautiful,  height ,features,qualities evrything may be damned....The person instantly scores certain points in his/her favour whereas a dark one has to do something to gain that..I find all that highly unfair attitudes.

Money..This is an all time important...it gets immediate respect... a person may be corrupt, uncouth, debauched and dishonest but if he/she has money, he is respected and given that extra privileges.One more thing if a rich lady wears an artificial ring..people take it for real and praise it as such, on the other hand if not so rich wears a real one also, even then people ask..is it artificial? We always let the perceptions rule and neglect the facts.

I feel that only models and people in glamarous fields should be analysed for their clothes ,like TV people should for their looks, because thay are there for them.

But even god judges the people after they are dead, so who are we to judge? what do you think?

PAATHSHALA

yesterday i saw the movie..Paathshala, and I didnt start with any expectation, but found it a good, clean, simple fun, and they have raised a very valid point..today all the parents want to give their children schools with all the facilities,and comfort, whereas schools are not five star hotels,they are not meant for comforts and indulgence,but they are a place to learn, and they shape your personality by hard labour and discipline. And the main emphasis should be on academics but what is happening is that to encash this psychology of parents, people are commercialising a noble profession, they are making glitzy colleges and schools and squeezing the parents with high fees and other things and making money for themselves..its no more a  noble profession but a business.

Earlier there used to be uniform, so that all look the same, today i see that they are creating a divide at a student level only..there are AC and Non AC rooms and different types of even mess for the people who can pay more.colleges are no more a temple of education. Earlier we had gurukul tradition.why? because their discipline and simple life made the children..strong in both, physically and mentally, ingrained in them the value of a disciplined life, simple living and high thoughts.But today we are teaching them that money is the most important thing. and then we complain that today's children are like this, like that....It is the parents who need to change their mindset.

I see so many parents cushioning their children to the extent that they are not able to face the nitty ,gritty of life..they are not doing a favour to their ward, rather making their future life difficult...because tough people always survive, as life is never a bed of roses even for people loaded.

There a few things children learn very early in life and thru parents only, so its the duty of parents to teach them value of hard work, discipline and to live with self respect, never to see the others and desire their luxury, living within their means, never ever enjoy the things parents cant afford, and live a life of dignity.

I have totally digressed from the movie..it has an ensemble cast of Shahid,Ayesha takia and Nana Patekar  and many children and one who used to play Wagle what is his name I am forgetting...the only problem is that they havent treated the subject very clearly, but it is a good attempt and worth a watch for a good idea.
I have seen many more movies, but about them next time.

Festivals

Today is Teej,..first festival which heralds the season of festivals,this is  a festival of fun for women folk and I am missing my daughter and DIl..From my childhood, I used to get a new dress and new bangles and all of us sit together and apply henna on our hands on this day and then we will have get togethers, and enjoy the swing together.But the long working hours of women are making it difficult for them to  celebrate such festivals with full enthu...and I think with our generation, may be all traditional festivals will be gone and their place will be taken by valentines,Bdays,anniversaries etc.

Now is the time for freedom, freedom from family, freedom from restrictions..so everybody likes modern celebrations more than our traditional ones, because in these festivals we dont enjoy by eating out, rather it is considered inauspicious, if we dont cook anything in the house .Then most of the time everything is done in the morning and we eat only after pooja, so another restriction.Whereas everybody wants to do everything at his/her own leisure,.so they find it convenient to celebrate other days. more than our own festivals.
Today I see everyone wanting a family, but without any efforts and same for traditions...nothing comes free..one has to do hard work for everything.

.But sometime some people have a family which makes one wonder.is it really worth it?....there is this person, lets call him S, he always looked after his siblings and family all his life, and so did his wife, today when he is old , and recently he got a fracture, his own son is living abroad, and his brother living in the same city didnt offer him  even to take to his place and look after him for atleast 15 days, S and his wife managed themselves.I can never see this happening with me..my siblings will come even from out of town to give me all the help I need.......apne apne sanskaar hain.......Life is not all about.I ME MYSELF.

Now about a good person..my sis has a maid who is very poor, still she daily sends some food to mosque in the days of ramjaan..now that is a good soul.

Happy teej and happy Ramjaan  !!!

Everything Extra........

Today I was reading someone's blog where she had written how people give all stale and expired food to servants and it touched a chord somewhere in my heart. I have seen that in many families whatever small quantity of daals and veg is left after food is stored in the fridge. Then they will clean the fridge in a week and give it all to  servants, I feel why not give it when it is fresh?..So many people never think of their servants as human beings who have some self respect and dignity.....never serve them properly,we can serve multiple cups of tea to our relatives and even insist them to over eat, but when it comes to servants.....we will give them whatever is just not of any use,nevr give them properly even in a plate and katori...and think of themselves as great who are donating, but I never think of giving discard items as donation or even good deed..its rather opposite,....they are taking care of our garbage. Giving means what they want and need, not what we have in surplus.

Once I read somewhere that we can guess the nature of a person from the way he behaves with a waiter in restaurant, I think we should add it to how we behave with our employess .

In a country like ours where many people go to sleep without food least we can do is.....

1...food items shouldnt be wasted..buy only as much as you need or may be less,never more.
2..we must neither over eat ourselves, nor insist our guests to do the same..it will be good for our health also.
3.try to give one meal to your maid...food what you eat,not somesthing substandard prepared for her...this is the best way of sharing.

I am trying to do all this..lets see......

Planning

Planning is an integral part of today's generation..They plan everything..marriage, career ,children, retirement everything, so much unlike us..people of our generation never thought much about anything..got married when parents decided,got children when god intervened and life went on. But recently on TV I saw the extremes of planning..there was this very big advertisement about funeral planning...I cant even imagine..I mean who plans for death and rituals and then they recommend it saying..so that your loved ones are saved the financial problems....I would say that if my loved ones are unable to do even my last rites, are they really my loved ones,then what about life insurance money? where that money will go..I would say..solicit life insurance policy, not this death planning.

Whenever we go to a restaurant here,the receptionist will always tell us more waiting time then actual,whereas in India, even if it will take one hour they will tell us..just 10 minutes sir, and then..please sir just a minute..and like this time passes and customers feels so irritated, whereas here she tells us 30 minutes and calls us in 15 and we feel happy..I started thinking why........and i realised here they are so confident that if someone comes to them for their service .food or ambiance he will no go anywhere else, but in India they are not sure of that and secondly they dont want to loose any customer..the difference of being in a developed country and a developing one.

Tagged by Amrita

Amrita  tagged me with a real special one. This is totally a different one, let me see whether I am able to do justice to this one......

1.A writeup on a kind gesture that someone had done for you which left you speechless
I am the sort of person who feels touched by little little gestures,I never think of big things.I am specially touched when they are done by strangers...So that way there are many incidents in my life..
Once  i was waiting at a bus stop in NOida and many buses came and went and I couldnt get in, then a young boy who was coming after playing badminton, stopped a bus and waited behind me till I boarded..that is one incidence I can never forget.
I ran a shop in Noida and there was this boy Shailesh who worked with me, and after leaving Noida , I got a letter from him (he couldnt even write well)..telling me to call him as he couldnt work with anyone else...I dont know why but most of my maids and servants have loved me so much that at times I feel overwhelmed.


2.Indebted to someone lifelong..who??

I am indebted to God for giving me so wonderful people in my life, as through them I have experienced all shades of life..love and hurt both, as without getting hurt, one cant value love..Whenever I have made some strong assumptions that I will do like this in my life(..some idealistic aproach to life)..god has made me fall flat on my face, just to tell me how small I am to make such  assumptions.And then he only helps me in standing on my feet.
3.Want to say "sorry" to someone..who???
There may be many:)...as I am a typical saggi..blunt and truthful to the core BUT without any malicious bone in me....And thats the reason that most of the time I am misunderstood so much so that, I cant say that there is even one person in this world who understands me well.My feelings, my intentions are always misconstrued..but thru this post I would like to say sorry to each and everyone who felt hurt  as I never wanted anyone to be hurt.
I am just a righteous person without any ambiguity.I cant stand the wrongs.

4.Want to say "thank you" to someone ..who??
Now this is going to be a list like those in filmfare awards:)..I for one nevr forget any kind deed or actions so I am indebted to many, have patience to see the list:)
My grand parents...dada daadi..through them I leant the meaning of pampering,and unlimited love, and they only instilled in me the values of honesty and integrity thru their religious and mythological literature which I read with them.
My dad...he is the one who made me confident, thru him I learnt that..family is more important than money and kindness is biggest virtue..and your deeds are your security and safety in your life ..as god alsways repays you for them.
My mom...because of her only I knew that mothers love their children unconditionally and take all the crap children give them.
My sis..for being a friend and counseller both, for being my soundboard for everything, for just being there for me......
My BIL..for loving and respecting me like a sister..
My Bro..He has given my immense support in all spheres of life..stood like a rock..whenevr I have a problem, I go to him and he always assures me that he would take care of it and Thank my SIl for supporting him.
My husband..for being what he is..so supporting and liberated and having immense faith and confidence in me.
My son..:..for loving me , looking after me and making me feel loved, for being always there for me.
My daughter:...for loving me , looking after me and making me feel loved, for being always there for me.
MY DIl......for loving me.
MY SIL....for making my daughter happy.
blog friends..for giving a new dimension to my life.





5.And whats your most cherished possession till date??

I have reached that stage in my life where I dont cherish things but people..I have lost that feeling of possesions.
6.A special moment in life which brings along a smile every time you think of it.

There are many but I would like to share one..When I got married, we were in Ranchi and one day while walking through college road I saw a torquoise purse in a shop and said ..accha lag raha ha.na.....when on 30th my husband got his salary, he bought that purse and brought home:).I still have vivid memories of that purse.and till today whenever my husband and son are there, I never tell them what I like, because they will get it for me.:)

and now I would like to Tag..-

Deeps    Madhu   Starry   Chanz   PinsNashes  Nancy  Shrutz

RAJNEETI

I saw Rajneeti last week...Its a story of feuding families, dirty politics and betrayal. I read somewhere that characters are derived from mahabaharat, but I dont think so, because Arjun was nowhere like Ranbir and same can be said for Ajay devgan(karn) and comparing the Character of Arjun Rampal with Yudhisthira would be blasphemy..they are so opposite, and Nana patekar as Krishna, totally wrong. Krishna cooperated for righteous, not for a family.

Ranbir kapoor has done a negative character with elan, whereas Katrina is effective in her looks,not acting.Arjun Rampal is shown as a very cruel person who can do anything in the politics in a most gory style..its disgusting to see this family.

Manoj Bajpeyi( Duryodhan) doesnt come off any worse that Ranbir's family, so one feels sympathy for him and Ajay Devgan.

Movie is very fast and one is lost among so many characters,trying to identify the relations.Since it is fast paced, one doesnt get bored, but I liked Praksh jha's Apharan and Gangajal more than this one.

The song..Piya mosey ....is very sweet I liked it.

Then I saw Phone Booth and Micky Blue Eyes.....Both of them were just ok, nothing special, just time pass.

and lastly I saw a master piece..SIKANDER..this is a movie about an orphan being brought up by an affectionate family in terrorist affected kashmir.Once he finds a pistol on the road and picks up and it changes his whole life.The scenery is beautiful. And Madhavan as a colonel in Army is exceptional.Ayesha as girl friend of parzad(sikander) and Sanjay soori as a terrorist turned politican..all suit the role...This movie is very interesting and frightening also in the sense that how one could be implicated in some sinister plots inspite of being innocent.

FROM US

Sometimes i find the atmosphere here so tranquil.like now I am sitting here with total silence except a few birds chirping outside, its so soothing to the mind instead of hearing the noise of horns,shouts and specially the noise produced by maids working in the house. On the other side sometimes I find living in a carpeted house total pain, as one has to all the time worry about not spilling anything.....home should be a place where one can relax..even in attitude:)
And then Indian cooking...I always sound the smoke alarm,here I came to know an interesting thing that since here the walls are made of wood, they absorb the strong aromas of spices in Asian cuisine and so the homes get a different smell forever, and are down traded.
This time I travelled by Lufthansa and for the first time business class..I realised that in the long journey seat comfort is the only thing I look for,food part one can neglect, because nobody can provide Indian food better or even equal to air India and the same I can say for the service. I have seen many airlines..BA,AA, but nothing beats our maharaja.At Frankfurt they were doing some renovation and there were complete chaos with nobody to tell us where to go and no signs, still none was complaining......It pains me to see that we can take so much of everything abroad with such calm, but go overboard in criticising when in India.Here also sometimes they dont start AC in Delta till plane is taking off, here also flights are delayed a lot.But here they never assist you much in anything, even if you are getting delayed due to the crowd, none comes forward to hurry, they are least bothered about you missing the flight, but in India there is always a call for you, an executive looking for you.
But one thing I like here is that at every counter everywhere be it market or office one is greeted with a smile and a friendly person, never with a grouchy and irritating behaviour.,,this we need to learn..etiquette's. Secondly they know how to make money..they have marketed everything they have.be it natural beauty or industry, whereas we never bother to commercialise our spots..no souvenirs,nothing.Here every city has a top station tower, city tour, boat trips, sunday markets and a few theme parks and everywhere plenty of souvenirs.
Its quite surprising for me that here nobody goes to anybody's home without invitation, and suppose if I go to them , even to give them some invitation, they wouldnt call me in, will accept it from the door only..but then sometimes this happens in Chennai also, but I like our Indian hospitality and sensibilities, even if it may be at the cost of some inconvenience, but I like everyone to come inside my home and I like to offer something.If we always keep thinking of our own comfort, inconvenience all the time we stop being a social animal which a human should be..........

WAKE UP SID

image courtesy.......http://satyamshot.wordpress.com/2009/11/

How much I wanted to see this movie and I was kind of dissatisfied with the story.This movie is about a rich spoilt son of a hardworking self made man.And this boy changes when he falls in love, though he doesnt know it........what I liked....
Ranbir kappor..he is so cute and innocent looking and full of life
Konkona sen sharma....she is my favourite actress, though here she is not at her best.
Shikha Talsania and Namit Das..both as friends of Ranbir are very good.
Rahul Khanna...is also OK here, though normally I like him as he looks so dashing and suave.
In the songs I liked Man Bawra more than Ik tara.

Now what didn't gel with me....

Ranbir being so rude to his mother......it was so unbecoming.
Character of his mother played by Supriya pathak...is not appealing at all, she looks pathetically gross and same for her character.
Ranbir .so young, just out of college and Konkona 27 year old..just didnt match..love shouldnt be so blind.

I started watching Pyar Impossible but couldnt..Uday chopra is so unbearable.:).

Yesterday I watched Daredevil....its a sort of fantasy like batman, spider man.but it was fun watching blind hero (Ben Afleck) doing all those actions and the same goes for heroine(Jennifer Garner)..I like to see girls doing action so well with so much perfection.

Lucky Tag

The Chinese tag which is supposed t o be lucky.....so I am bringing luck today by doing it:) was tagged by Chanz.....


8 TV shows/News Channels I like to watch

I am not a TV addict at all and just get irritated by soaps, where heroines are super girls, and men are good for nothing, and then every thing always go wrong:)..still I like comedy or movies or some talk shows
1. Sarabhai vs. Sarabhai

2.Ghar Jamai

3.Jhoom India or something like this was there on Sahara..singing competition.

4.Full House

5.Boy meets the world

6.Koffee with Karan

7.Mahabharat

8.Everybody Loves Raymond


8 Places to eat and dine...

I always try new places everywhere, now let me see what I can remember.....

1..Raintree..chennai.(eco hotel)

2.Sarvanas.

3.Copper & Chimney

4.Cafe Tapas

5.Green Park.Vadapalani.

6.Tadka..Hyderabad

7.Hyatt and Kanishka Delhi

8.There was this one very good hotel in Nagpur , I just cant remember the name, so instead of that I will say...Ohri's at Hyderabad Central


8Things I Look Forward To

1..I am looking forward to see my daughter's new home.

2..for summer to end..

3.for my 2 nephew's admissions...

4..to my trip to US next month.

5..Looking forward to have grand children:)

6.


8 Things That Happened Yesterday
1. I had three baths..oh yes it was that hot.
2.my son called.
3.Got a gift from my children.
4.Saw my bro crying because his son is going away to study:)
5. got a long awaited cheque.
6.In the dinner I planned son papdi as a dessert, and then realised it was orange flavoured, and we couldnt take it( Friday we fast)..
7.First time I fried Makhanas and they were very tasty.
8.I read Cosmopolitan and totally felt out of the place.


8 Things I love about Winter
1..I just love winter:)
2.Can drink lots of tea.
3. enjoy the sun, sit outside
4.Then we munch on peanuts.
5.winter with it brings.gajar ka halwa:)
6.Love the feel of hiding behind the quilts..its long since we had that pleasure.
7.No sweating.
8. enjoy wearing sarees and accessories.


8 Things on my Wish-list

1.I want my family to be a cohesive one where youngsters respectful to elders and elders are forgiving and generous.
2.want to live a frugal life.
3.want to love one and all.
4.want my self to be a little detached.to practice attachment with detachment.
5.want to be independent forever..physically, financially and mentally.
6-want to live near nature.
7.Be forgiving.
8.To be generous in mind and spirit both.

8 Things I am Passionate about
1. reading
2.blogging,
3.being kind and human to everybody.
4.being Eco friendly.
5.wastage of water irritates me too much.
6.want to buy only what I can use.
7. Dont like our culture of over feeding our guests and family, and buying everything more than we need as I feel that whenever we take anything extra, we snatch some one else's share, as god has made everything sufficient for all the people.
8.I believe in sharing.


8 Words/Phrases I often use
1. I read
2.exactly
3.Hey bhagwan
4.OMG
5.

8 Things I learnt from the past
1. Dont expect anything from anyone as expectations always bring unhappiness.
2.Be circumspect.
3.Learn the boundaries of every relationship and respect them.
4.Neither exploit anyone, nor let yourself be taken for granted.
5.Dont run after anyone, as people are like shadow.
6. Never be rude to anyone, words hurt more than actions even.
7.Always do good, and it is bound to come back to you.
8. Never ever shirk from your duties, however cumbersome they may sound to you,, as they are the ultimate test of our character.


8 Places I would like to go /Visit

1.Ooty..though I have been there once, I want to go again.
2.Imphal
3.Kashmir
4.Shimla
5.Jageshwar
6.Binsar.
7.Jaisalmer
8.Mount Abu




8 Things I currently need/want.....
I dont need anything at present, I have everything Iwant, I just need people:)

8 Blogging Buddies I want to Tag
1.Amrita
2.Nivedita
3.Chandrika Shubham
4.SG
5.Gauri Guha
6.Tomz
7.Poonam J
8.Sandhya

Few numbers are left:)..I will try to fill them later on.