Christmas time

Now Christmas fever has started .so everywhere Christmas decorations and everything in the shape of Santa and other related items is available. It looks so festive.
But some times I feel  that this is where consumerism starts...Even my child wants everything..today and now..there is no end to gifts...we keep buying things, even if we have no place to keep them and most of the things are forgotten after 15 days.Aren't we wasting the resources?
Why we have connected everything with gifts and things?
Cant we enjoy with what we have?
Today there is no line between need and want..whatever I want I need that.Nobody wants to see the repercussions of this self centred nature.We are teaching the same thing to our children also..they want gift at the drop of the hat..
I feel totally disenchanted with this  trend...of shopping indiscriminately..

GIFTS

Diwali is awaited with so so much of enthusiasm and now its gone:(.and it is synonymous with gifts.Dont know why but I am not a gracious person while accepting gifts, I feel very awkward too.So many times I keep mulling that from the next year i will take a vow not to accept anything from anyone..then postpone it for another year:).Actually now at my age I dont want to take anything..I just want to give..though my hubby says that if you dont take, then you cant give also:)

Lot many people decide the type and amount of gift depending on the status of recipient,rich people get opulent gifts,whereas not so make do with ordinary things. whereas I think gifts should be decided by the status of the person who si giving..and I keep thinking that I must have that uniformity in mind, but then mind starts thinking that wouldnt it be injustice to a person who is giving you more? and I am always in a confusion about what is right..and if  are you are reading my blog regularly, you must be knowing by now that I have this fetish for doing the right thing always.To me being righteous and fair is very important...and on the other hand I dont like to be taken for granted too.

So what do you think is the right way?..Should we always reciprocate only? or should we keep giving even if some people dont?

Festivals

This time of year is my favourite as most of the festivals fall in this period.Though sometimes in a month I have 15 days fast:)Last week was karvachauth.And I feel amused to see how the face of festivals have changed. In our childhood festivals meant cleaning the house, decorating it and lots and lots of cooking and making sweets and snacks and then distributing. To a some extent it is still like that for me.We dont cook or light a gas only in mourning, so its considered bad omen not to cook on festivals.But today its a given that many of the women dont cook on Karvachauth and their hubbies take them out to dinner.But I dont  do that, I still make special dishes and we have a sumptuous dinner on all the festivals.Then we give byana to MILs...and MILs give sari and other gifts to DIL..basically these give and takes were meant to bring them together..MILs welcome the new entrant into their family with love and gifts and DILS give the gifts to get blessings and as a thanks giving to the person because of whom they got their husband.....In any family women were considered more important, so all the shaguns were made for women,because its only woman who makes or breaks a home.

Today is Ahoi Ashtami and again fasting for children..I was just thinking that many women  query that do men fast for us then why should we? but do the children fast for us then why should we? But I dont go into that frame of mind at all...I am missing my children and the no. has increased this year with my little angel:)...On ashtami I make all the chaat items and my daughter used to love that, so I miss her very much.
I believe in celebrating all the festivals with festive spirit and following the traditions and rituals, as they always teach us something,..like to adjust,to work hard(with all the cooking and cleaning),how to live with community and a feeling of sharing, only we must be ready to learn. And they are our roots, we cant be happy far away from our roots.

Fasting in Navraatri

Navratri has gone and so the fasting for us too.I feel so nice during those days. Fasting is one process which is advised in every religion..muslims fast twice a year in Ramadan, Christians have their own lent period, Jains have their paryushions.etc etc. Most of the commandments are also similar ..like these are the days  a sort of penance, so be pious,share the food, donate ,and dont harbour bad feelings.
We have one more, like eat satvik food.As food affects our mental process.Many people make fun of the people who are fasting and feasting saying that what is the point in fasting if you are making no so many dishes or eating all that,but they themselves cant do it even for a day with all that feasting too, but i have never felt so, Even to my children i say keep the fast, but you may feast , but on restricted items only, but inspite of that my daughter does it and son doesnt, so fine.its their choice.Though I dont eat fried items and lot of sweets as my age and health doesnt allow that, but wouldnt mind if someone does it.Because whatever I do, still for 9 days I am following lot of discipline..like cant have any bed tea, first have bath and pooja, then only anything to eat or drink. Then we dont have any salted breakfast, we skip lunch and eat only dinner. In dinner too its only limited variety which can be taken..not everything..so these days are all about bringing some discipline. Plus they give us such a nice feel when we do some special pooja everyday.And when on the Navmi, I prepare, halwa ,poori, chana and distribute it a as a prasad, its a culmination of days of fasting, so gives you so much of satisfaction.
Inspite of that if people find that its all feasting only, then try doing it for some time, and then only you can realise whether it is easy or feasting or fasting.It always needs lot of discipline of body and mind, we go out and see so many culinary delights, but never could partake..
Traditional ways of celebrating festivals always include some fasting and feasting, we have accepted feasting, but deride fasting:).. When we can accept the valentine day celebrations so easily without any analysis, why not our own festivals.And if anyone feels the need to say..why? why should I only? then its not worth it.These are all emotional things and if one is not emotionally connected to someone to do it unconditionally, no point in doing it...I used to fast it from the beginning, and never thought that why should I, why not my husband too? rather felt very happy in doing everything, when on the way he joined me in fasting, I dont even remember and today too, I dont worry about myself, but if he is being strict in fasting, I worry..want to give him the best I can....Thats companionship to me..or love...loving doesnt mean enjoying together only, but being there all t he times..good or bad, easy or tough, and caring without thinking what the other person does for us.

service providers in India

Now in India we get everything which was not earlier available but after sales service is pathetic and its not given much importance whereas to me it is one of the most important criteria while buying things.

I am using airtel..mobile and broad band connection both and I face many problems like..
they automatically subscribe to caller tunes or other some such service and deduct the money, now I am harassed like anything to mail them, call them and again and again to stop it and refund the amount,they refund first day in the morning and restart same day in the evening.......and one has to call them again and again and its such a wastage of time and money too, as for the last part of call they charge...
Then they deduct at the wrong rates for STD and then I keep quiet,as I dont find the strength to complain all the time..why such big companies resort to such service or I would call it cheating, as there are many customers who cant complain all the time,and so bear the cost of such frills though undemanded and needed.
Then even for broadband they charge the amount even for the days I wasnt home.and their bills show that it was used on those dates, now how could that be?, I dont know if anything can be more ridiculous than that

Even in the hospitals, they are getting so commercial..yesterday I went to Apollo Chennai, and it was crowded like a railway station and now they have posted a guard at the gate.a la hotel who salutes you every time you enter.its so irritating to see him..helloooooo this is a hospital..
And then secretaries to doctors are so arrogant and rude..last time I went, she told me that for new patients one can get the appointment, but for old ones appointment is available after 4 months only..what is this..I am sick today, so how can I wait for another 4 months..its better not give to new ones, they will go to someone else, but no, that way they will loose the customer..yes thats they way they treat patients...they charge highly for every service, but what they provide is service without a smile and in a hurry...In a commercial world, we cant complain about the charges and we have to pay whatever they demand, but then we can demand a good service atleast..they must treat the patients with respect and give them time, but one gets none of these..it looks like as if they are doing charity.

Yesterday was Onam, and I saw everywhere women dressed up in those cream sarees..how lovely they look, next on my shopping list is one kerala saree..everywhere there was a beautiful pookolam.Now Isphanai centre has two new cafes , and madras cafe serving new innovative dishes and at a reasonable price also.There I saw a shop selling good purses and hand bags, brought here from UK, a designer named David Jones I think..they were quite good. The best thing about coming back home is looking at people decked up in beautiful sarees.such a pleasure to eyes:)

Discipline

Today I saw many pictures in the newspaper about children being initiated into learning..VIDYARAMBHAM..as is the tradition here but surprised to see that first alphabet being taught was A,I thought it would be their own.
NOW the biggest and most enjoyable festival is in the offing and it pleases me no end to see the ads in newspapers everyday..makes my day festive. This year Diwali is special to me as my son and DIL will be with me. When he was young I used to tell him, that stay wherever you want, but make it a point to come home on Diwali, but practically it is not possible.To me Diwali pooja is very auspicious and I would love it if I have my children with me, but due to the traditions I am unable to desire the presence of my daughter and just miss her all the time. Now a days when I am cleaning the home to welcome Lakshmi, I miss her so much,she  brings so much of pleasure with her presence, I feel so much at peace, and there is nothing impossible, if I am tired she will do it,.... sometime I rue the traditions....
 Yesterday i was talking to someone about children upbringing, and everybody had the opinion that todays parents are bringing up their children with a total disregard for etiquette's and discipline. May be since they didnt get that type of freedom and pampering, they want to give their children all that, but the result is disastrous.Children dont greet the guests, eat whatever they want and whenever they want, are not courteous to neighbours and not thankful for small gifts.Discipline and hard work is the key to success in life, so never replace them and always remember to bring up responsible citizens, evolved humans with kindness in their heart and respect for fellow citizens.Encourage delayed gratification than instant one.

Handicrafts

Craft Council Of India is running an exhibition of different things at Valluvar kottum..Chennai till 17th.I keep track of all handicraft exhibitions and make a point to see them and buy something from there.Its our duty to save our rich heritage, unless we  support them these ancient arts will vanish. And yesterdays outing was a complete delight.they had so many good things over there, so I bought  quite a few, instead of token things..bamboo mats,silk cushions, kota saree, venkatgiri suit material..directly from the weaver and some more material from jaipur.I urge you all whoa re in Chennai to atleast go there and see.
Yesterday we went to a very old Kali temple in Parry's..this Parry's was named after a company and today most of the people pronounce it as Paris:)..This temple is very old.some 500 years, it was on the beach,later on shifted here.It has certain divine feel, now-a-days Navraatri is going on and since me and my husband fast for 9 days, we want to so much to visit some durga temple, so yesterday's visit was a blessing to me.I felt so happy there and regretted that I coudnt take any prasad from there(as we partake only selected food now-a-days.)..I dont keep a nirjal fast or something similar, I would rather that i am able to maintain this tradition of mine, so we take milk and fruits and food only one time a day.I have seen many people who will keep an strict fast and then wouldnot like to anything in the house, but, I from the beginning maintained the normal routine of my home, nobody would feel any inconvenience due to my fast:) and I cook and work evrything as usual:)

Last week I saw Karthik calling Karthik...it has a very unique story line with the schizophrenic Hero, but they goofed up with the selection of Farhan Akhtar, he just messed up the movie..if it was made with some good actor..would have been lovable, Deepika Padukon is the only delight in an otherwise a slow movie. In scenes where simple Farhan changes into an smart one, he looks more like a villain than a hero, and change is not much visible even physically, I remembered..CHOTI SI BAAT where a simple Amol Palekar changes into an smart one with so much of endearing and cute style. 
Yesterday when I switched on the TV..Fir Wahi Dil Laya Hoon.was being aired on SAB TV and I just loved it..old movies have such a simple story line with lots of foot tapping musice and melodies, beautiful heroine romancing a handsome dude, and they live happily ever after..my idea of true entertainment, may not be path breaking, but fun to watch on sunday evening, now I will have to get the songs of this movie, otherwise I have the music from most of those old romantic movies:)..so relaxing to listen to that:)

WISHING YOU ALL A VERY HAPPY NAVRAATRI AND VIJAYA DASHMI!!!

Festivals

Today is Teej,..first festival which heralds the season of festivals,this is  a festival of fun for women folk and I am missing my daughter and DIl..From my childhood, I used to get a new dress and new bangles and all of us sit together and apply henna on our hands on this day and then we will have get togethers, and enjoy the swing together.But the long working hours of women are making it difficult for them to  celebrate such festivals with full enthu...and I think with our generation, may be all traditional festivals will be gone and their place will be taken by valentines,Bdays,anniversaries etc.

Now is the time for freedom, freedom from family, freedom from restrictions..so everybody likes modern celebrations more than our traditional ones, because in these festivals we dont enjoy by eating out, rather it is considered inauspicious, if we dont cook anything in the house .Then most of the time everything is done in the morning and we eat only after pooja, so another restriction.Whereas everybody wants to do everything at his/her own leisure,.so they find it convenient to celebrate other days. more than our own festivals.
Today I see everyone wanting a family, but without any efforts and same for traditions...nothing comes free..one has to do hard work for everything.

.But sometime some people have a family which makes one wonder.is it really worth it?....there is this person, lets call him S, he always looked after his siblings and family all his life, and so did his wife, today when he is old , and recently he got a fracture, his own son is living abroad, and his brother living in the same city didnt offer him  even to take to his place and look after him for atleast 15 days, S and his wife managed themselves.I can never see this happening with me..my siblings will come even from out of town to give me all the help I need.......apne apne sanskaar hain.......Life is not all about.I ME MYSELF.

Now about a good person..my sis has a maid who is very poor, still she daily sends some food to mosque in the days of ramjaan..now that is a good soul.

Happy teej and happy Ramjaan  !!!

Sankranti

THREE BIG FISHES
kOLAM MADE ON OUR MAIN GATE
kOVALAM Beach
Been away from this place two long for me:) actually i had my hubby's sister and her husband with us. Both are senior citizens and in the same boat as us( their son also settled in US)..so i was busy with cooking, talking and as usual my maid was absent. But we met after a long time, so enjoyed picking up the threads about all our distant relations and everything going in the family, as we are living quite in a distant place here...and sometimes I think I live in my own virtual world quite out of the sync with reality, talking with her I realised that still there are.....

Inlaws who dont allow their DILs to wear salwar kameez even, leave aside western wear......( I never ever set any protocol about dress to my DIl, its totally her choice what she wants to wear),

MILs.. who dont help at all their DILs in any housework when they visit......

Still a girl's parents are looked down upon by her inlaws if they stay....

There are parents who dont help their daughters much if they need any financial assistance, though the parents are rich and can do so, but they let their daughters suffer.

MILs have the authority to scold their DILs for their mistakes.

And this I am talking about educated, well-to-do families.

I was quite surprised , but life is such, it surprises you at every corner..if you see one person always doing and thinking about the right thing, then dont think that even that gives the right results. It is always different permutations and combinations in life for anything and everything .I read on many blogs that there is no right and wrongs about disliking inlaws..its personal choices only, but I think that there IS right and wrong my dear..its wrong not to want to live with your inlaws but your parents are fine.if they live with you...If we deny someone's right, we never get that in our life also. To live always the way we want to without any thoughts about good or bad, or whom we are hurting is not living like a human being. I dont believe that any boy can love his wife whole heartedly if she is not respectful of his parents..I completely refuse to believe that....none is made like that....not atleast educated cultured boys.so the girls who think like that, dont even know what they are missing and what they are loosing in this bargain.......

We were planning to go to Chidambarm and Thanjavur etc, but didt due to this eclipse,one day we went to Covelong or Kovalam, whatever is that. I had read so much about this place, and the route was quite scenic also.this is a small fishing village. But it is very dirty, all the place is full of garbage..littered everywhere...It could be a good spot if our govt. takes some interest. but presently it is in bad shape.there were many boats, long and narrow ones, one fisherman caught 3 big silver colored fishes int that.Beach is quite good and unique with some rocks and all. There is a dargah also, there also first time I found that many people were after you for money, religion is being sold everywhere..I thought only Hindu Pandas are like that.Most of the places demand some cleanliness.

We wanted to see # Idiots but didnt get the tickets:(

BELATED HAPPY PONGAL, SANKARANTI AND LOHRI TO ALL !!!

HOLI KE RANG---KITNE ALAG AUR KITNE SANG

Khaa key gujiya, pee key bhaang,
laaga k thora thora sa rang,
baaja ke dholak aur mridang,
khele holi hum tere sang.
HOLI MUBARAK!!!!

Holi par sabhi ko sabhi rango se milkar ek rang,
apko mile jo apki khusiyon ko rangin bana de.
Happy Holi!!






Rang udaye Pichkari
rang se rang jaye duniya sari
holi ke rang aapke jeevan ko rang de
ye shubha kaana hai hamari.
HAPPY HOLI !!!

Rango Ke Tyohar Me Sabhi Rango Ki Ho Bharmar Dher Saari Khushiyo Se Bhara Ho Aapka Sansar,
Yahi Dua hai Bhagwan Se Hamari Har bar,
Holi Mubarak!


Makki ki Roti, Nimbu ka Aachar, Suraj Ki Kirne, Khushiyo ki Bahar,
Chand Ki Chandi, Apno ka Pyar,
Mubarak Ho Aapko, HOLI ka Tyohar



Pichkari ki dhar,
gular ki bauchar,
apno ka pyar,
yahi hai HOLI ka tyohar.
Wishing you and your family a very hapy and colourful HOLI.




Lal, gulabi, neela, pila hathon me liya samet
Holi ke din rangenge sajni, kar ke meethi bhent.



Gul ne gulshan se gulfam bheja hai,
Sitaro ne aasman se salaam bheja hai,
Mubaraq ho aapko holi ka tyohar
Humne dil se yeh paigam bheja hai.



Rango ke tyohar mein sabhi rango ki ho bharmar,
Dher saari khushiyon se bhara ho aapka sansar,
Yahi dua hai bhagwan se hamari har bar,
Holi Mubarak ho mere yaar!


Dipped in hues of love and trust has come the festival of Holi. Happy Holi!! Bright colors, water balloons, lavish gujiyas and melodious songs are the ingredients of perfect Holi.



Wish you a very happy and wonderful Holi.



May God gift you all the colors of life,colors of joy, colors of happiness, colors of friendship,
colors of love and all other colors you want to paint in your life.
Happy Holi.
If wishes come in rainbow colors thenI would send the brightest one to say



Happy Holi.
Best wishes to you for a Holi filled with sweet moments and memories to cherish for long.Happy Holi!!!

Source..email

MY THOUGHTS ON VARIOUS THINGS

GIFTS ALL PACKED

ITEMS I PACKED IN THEM

Today my post is more about my reaction to different readings in newspaper and blogs:)


I was reading this news about Julia Robert's stay in Bangalore..award winning Julia Roberts and her cameraman husband......find it quite amusing ,these adjectives which journalists add to people..isnt it funny....are the awards to be flaunted like that or must the profession be always added before the name, cant say about others but I dislike both praise and demeaning in this way..............like somewhere I read...small time actress.....i mean what is this..an actress is an actress......and then they have coined a word...starlet seems to me rhyming with piglet:).I dont know if there is any such word for male actors also?


Then i read at a blog how she felt bad at the behaviour of her parents and few incidents reminded me of my children's childhood. When my daughter used to get her report card, her friends used to say that if they had got marks like her their mothers would be at the top of the world and my daughter would say...but my mom will ask me why 95, why not 98, where did u loose 3 marks?............I never meant to hurt my daughter, it never even came to my mind, since she was at topper and we had such expectations from her.Even for the water bottles, they used to break one in a month atleast, and same for the keds. Even sometimes my son also has this complaint that he never got the praise for his marks, if he was in top 5 we wanted him in top 3 and when he was in top 3 we wanted him right at the top:)..again the expectations and now it has become the bad word in my dictionary.if the children feel so hurt by these things that means parents are wrong somehwere..but where and how...can a middle class parent can afford to ignore the studies and academics in India......tomorrow if the children are not well settled, wont they blame parent..wont they say....we were young but you were adults, you should have been strict with us? wont we as parents wouldn't feel unhappy if we are not able to enhance their careers? Then may be we as parent would feel guily of not fulfilling our duties sincerely.....Seems to me that for parents its a nowin situation...you be strict and make them study, get them settled...still they feel hurt, You let them free..they dont study...dont fare well...they blame you for their failures. Sometimes being a parent is the toughest profession in life.But personally I would say that I loved my children more than anything in the life, nothing else mattered to me more than their happiness and life, and I took most of the decisions thinking about them first.......... Many times i have seen that strict parents make their children's life much better and happier.in the long run.......while pampering them silly makes them suffer in their life later.....like an efficient person always gets lot of appreciation and praise which makes him always happy and increases his confidence in life, whereas for the others, no compliment and no praise makes them feel sometimes as if they are not good for anything,Once i was in Warora and there was this young married girl who was educated but knew nothing at all about housekeeping.She belonged to a rich family where everything was done by servants.and she was miserable as she didnt feel like doing any housework and made her husband's life also miserable with a dirty ill kept house, no cooking( eating outside all the time..and this is not a healthy option, plus being a small place it was not feasible also, they always had their meals at the guest house where food was prepared with lot of oil and spices, I never liked it much), she was very good to talk to and so i learned a little about her....it was about ,not teaching ur chidren any work and then by chance her husband got a job in a such place where whithout doing anything one couldnt live......may be it was mismatched priorities, but then learning about the household never goes wasted,like i taught my daughter to work hard, be economical.....or i would say i didnt teach her, she learned by watching me and today with her hard working nature she is able to manage a job , house everything so well and makes so many people happy and I am so proud of her which i couldnt be if she was a lazy. and all that.
Heard somwhere that negativity sells...... but i dont think also, its always the positives in life which make it beautiful,and getting more comments with the negativity cant be a criteria for a post.I believe that more we write about positive values and good in life, more it is spread.
In the last post I wrote about Screen awards and we all blasted them...but on retrospection I thought that arent all the awards same..even these awards on blogs? How many people think twice before awarding them or giving those beautiful adjectives to one and all, if we cant be genuine in a small thing where it wont even alter anything much how can we expect others to reform. here we comment for the sake of increasing traffic, and sometimes even talk not worth mentioning even ,get so fullsome praise.....arent we fake then? We must clean our cupboards first then think about others....I am taking a resolution today that whatever i comment must be genuine and the same for awards, are you?


And last:) yesterday i did Haldi Kumkum in my style.....putting a few photographs here:), I prepared Halwa,peanuts masala,aloo bonda & sewian pulao in refreshments and gave them all a small token gift ( a small jewellery box,bindi,hanki,haldi kumum and supari

Festivals week

http://www.thanksgiving-day.org/makar-sankranti.html
photopage.wordpress.com

--pongal picture

This is the week of festivities....LOHRI,PONGAL,SANKARANTI, SAKAT all together. basically all these festival celebrate the harvest.
LOHRI is celebrated on 13th. I know this much about it only.......First Lohri of any bride is very special, she is given lot of gifts,and its celebrated with lot of joy, with bonfire, rewri, peanuts etc.
Pongal....Yesterday i asked my neighbours what you do on this day, she told me that they take sugar cane, haldi and all that and worship Sun god and make few delicacies like sweet pongal etc.
My daughter makes Pachdi...mixture of five thing..sweet,sour,bitter..all the taste and it symbolises that one must face all the things in life with the equanimity.

From this day starts SHUKL Paksh and so the season of Haldi kumkum in Maharashtra,--I wrote the details here.SANKRANTI----I know a little about it, as its celebrated in our family.I remember my childhood, when on this day my mother used to ask us not to eat anything without मिन्सिंग ..its giving out something..on this day she will get fresh Gazak and put it in a plate one for each of us with some money and we shall give it. Then after the first year of marriage, on this day girl/s parents send all the clothes and sweets for inlaws.I still remember that my chacha's inlaws used to send so much of special sweets on this day..like varieties of laddoos, in those day sankaranti laddoos used to be very big ones ,like something of 250 gm each, and then in 5 laddoes one silver coin would be put inside in a small box..one in each. Now I know that most of the young girls reading it will question..why should a girl's parents only do something:).........I always told my daughter not to interfere in what i am giving and always take pride in whatever i do, and the same I am writing here...these are traditions..made to make the relationships better, may be in the earlier days they thought that their daughter lives with the other family, so they wanted to please the family..but now.a.days, I think that if we can afford..though this is also very subjective, because everybody does everything, only the scale or the range varies,we must follow the traditions, because if we start questioning everything, then we shall loose all the traditions and celebration will mean only either making food or eating outside and then only we will miss all this. These small traditions dont make any difference to even inlaws...as most of the time gifts are hardly used, they just make them happy that somebody gives them respect.yes , these things should be out of choice only, none should be compelled to do it, but at the same time one should not abolish all the systems... and today's generation is so kind hearted and generous in donations and other things, then why this old mindset of being against inlaws...when everything is changing...and they want everybody to change all the perspectives, I would say..first change yourself and remove this negative perception of inlaws...think of them as your own and once you start think REALLY that way, you would never have these questions...फ़िर सब अपने होंगे तो कहीं कुछ बुरा नही लगेगा,कौन दे रहा हा कौन ले रहा हा, सभी तो अपने हैं.when in all other relationships, nobody questions any give and take, why this negative feeling ward inlaws....see here everybody has the same relationships somewhere------I am a mother and MIL both,,, and personally i feel lot of happiness while doing everything, and feel bad when for some reason I can do anything. When I love my daughter so much , I care for her inlaws also who have given her respect and love in their family, for that i am eternally indebted to them.This is my take on life:)
SAKAT This is Ganesh Chaturthi and celebrated as sakat for us this month and this year it falls on sakranti day.We keep fast, prepare some sesame delicacies like TILKUT, Laddo,..receipe here take out Baayana..give it to our MIL, then worship the moon at night and then have the dinner.
WISHING YOU ALL A VERY HAPPY LOHRI,PONGAL AND SANKRANTI !

A WEEK OF FESTIVITIES

This last wek has been extremely busy one for me, as we have so many festivals in this fortnight
SHARAD POORNIMA-- I made some kheer and left it out in the moon light for the night, to be eaten next morning.It is considered to be good for health.AHOI ASHTAMI--on this day I do the fast for the health, wealth and long life of my children( actually earlier women used to do it for the boys only but i always did it for my children---daughter and son both). In the veenong we do pooja AHOI MATA and I make sweet and salted KHANKRI , and to compliment it i make all the pther things also sometimes chola and dahi bada, golguppa.
DHANTERAS---This is the day for shopping, so we buy something and went to wish a few people. Buying something today is considered auspicious.
CHOTI DIWALI---We light 21 diyas this day and do pooja and decoration of the house.
here in Chennai--all the celebration is done on this day, as the next day is amavasya and women fast---I asked a girl.....dont u question this tradition why only girls fast not boys? She replied--nobody is asking us or compelling us, this is the tradition , and we follow it happily and voluntarily.
DIWALI---- We celebrate the return of Lord Rama from his 14 yrs exile to his home.So on this day we make sweets, bring crackers, dresses and all that. And we worship Lord ganesha and Godess lakshmi. Ganpati is always worshipped first while doing any pooja, he removes the hurdles in life and brings harmony and wellness. While laksmi is the goddess of prosperity.
This year while going to friends places wishing them, taking sweets, we went to wish to NETHAJI MERCY HOME also, we took the dresses for all the children and chips ( actually they said dont bring sweets). The children there are so nice, well mannered and lovable. It gives me immense pleasure to watch them, meet them..
I am puting up a few photographs of crackers, rest tomorrow:)
Today we will do all pooja of Laksmi Ganesh and all that in the eveningThis is my diwali:), so much fun, how was yours?
WISH YOU ALL A VERY HAPPY AND PROSPEROUS DIWALI ! ENJOY THE FESIVAL OF LIGHTS!

SPECIAL DAY FOR SPECIAL PERSON IN UR LIFE

http://www.karwachauth.com/karwa-chauth-vrat-katha.html

SPECIAL DAY FOR SPECIAL PERSON
Its one of the most beautiful moments of married life when a wife fast for the long life of her husband.It started in the times when people lived for others, cared for others more than the self.This is a special day where wives are pampered by their husbands and inlaws and made to feel special. Where they fast but still prepare a sumptuous dinner for the family to celebrate.

But alas! this was in our time, now a days when either the wives demand from their husbands to fast or the husbands fast themselves to show their solidarity with the wives, that special feeling is gone. because now no one is special as both are fasting and may be cooking, so I think the other things should also change, I feel very sorry to see the present state of affairs where in the name of equality all our special moments are loosing their charm slowly and slowly, I just hope that better sense prevails upon the younger generation and instead of always demanding, they start thinking of doing things. Why earlier mothers were revered so much, because they did so much for the family without demanding, but where will today's mother go? What sort of ideal they will make for their progeny?In our society man was the provider and woman home maker. man brought security- financial and physical for the woman and woman made a home for him to come back to. What a beautiful combination! none was better or higher as per se, but any one who didnt do his job properly was considered lousy.Man was admired and respected for his earning ability and women for her house keeping and beauty.But there was no comparison between them,like one cant make comparisons between a lock and key, as they are not equal in looks or work but both are useless without the other and work well combined together.Actually comparisons are odious as they can be made only between two basically similar things, which they are not.So when and where and how all this equality business started I dont know, but it has messed up all things beautiful, Where earlier the girls used to be feminine, soft ,caring, and working hard to give their family a good life( I am talking about in general terms, not the aberrations), todays girls are turning into hard, aggressive,stubborn persons, with a self centric mind, with a I,ME,MYSELF syndrome.And frankly they are fighting their battles quite un fairly, like they stil want the husband, to bring money into the house and keep on doing everything the man are used to, but they dont want to keep their side of bargain

.I feel the real equality lies in fulfilling one's duties with a sincerity and diligence and honesty whether its a boy or a girl.Instead of makings our daughters behave like man, we should feel proud of having daughters,people who have daughters are the privileged one, as its their daughters who turn others houses into homes,Specially in our culture Kanyaadan is the biggest daan, and when we perform this we should fully comprehend the meaning of this, its not a ritual only.

I have completely digressed from the topic:), on 17th is karva chauth. On this day womaen get gifts from their husband, mother and mother-in-law. One day before they put henna on their hands, buy new bangles. i still remember that when i was in Delhi..Lajpat nagar used to have such a festive look, with all decorated shops selling Sehri items. certain people eat goodies in the early morning and it is called Sehri.And on this day age is no bar, women of all ages dress up so well, doing SOLAH SRINGAR its a sight to behold. Then fast is kept on this day, in the evening pooja is done..its different in different people...like some places women get together and do it, in my place we do it at home only and a Baayna is given to MIL--its a sort of gift only and given as a respect to the person who gave us our husbands and who has a very important role in making our life happy.

Then in the evening after looking at the moon and doing the pooja, women open the fast. I still remember mychildhood, my father who was never home early, will come in time on this day and go on the third floor of our house to see the moon and their in the mohalla all the husbands wud be found on the terrace:). it was such a pleasant feeling to see all that.

festivals are meant to be celebrated in spirit and then they bring a bonhomie among the people, but if everything we start analysing and argueing..why shud only women do it, why cant men do it and all that, then they loose all the sweetness.When we love each other then we dont see what all one is doing, its all about doing something for the other,all the festivals mean to strength some relation ships.

like--Rakhi--bhaidooj---brother sister

karvachauth....husband wife,DIL & MIL

ahoi ashtami....mother -children,

and they bring a cohesiveness in the family. I fully enjoy all the festivals with full fervour and instead of thinking what others are doing for me, i always think what I am doing for them:)

SO JUST ENJOY :)

HALDI KUMKUM

http://www.clas.ufl.edu/users/vasu/traditions/chapter16/adiv3.jpg

I like this tradition of Haldi Kumkum very much. It is prevalent in mahharashtra,MP and southern states.Most of the time two times in a year..once after 14 January and second time either in navraatri or in Shravan maas, women perform it.best part I like is that evryone is dressed to the hilt:)..in silk, Kanjeevarams, sarees,jwellery and here in Chennai with Malli poo(mogra flowers).

For this they invite all the ladies home, some people give the invitation by offering Sindoor Then at home..... they welcome you with Turmeric and Sindoor. You sit there. Then they will give you few things...like fresh coconut,few betel leaves..sachet or small fancy boxes of turmeric and Sindoor, some money ..coin...Supari and some small thing to eat.With this they may offer you some small gift also. In these days in Dewas the whole market used to be full of small items, as people buy in bulk, may be a spoon, box,bag anything. Then in the end you are offered some sweet saunf and dabbed with Itar(perfume). This tradition is considered to be very auspicious.
yesterday i went to two houses and was amazed to see their Golu and pooja preparations and i have two more invitations:). So much fun:)

NAVRAATRI,

http://www.blessingsonthenet.com/temple/currfestival.asp?festivalid=F0736

http://www.iimageworld.com/image788.html

From today Navraatri are starting,it is a festival of nine days and the starting of auspicious time considered good for starting any new venture, entering new homes,buying property, vehicles etc etc. It is a celebration of nine days, ceberated through out the country but with a little difference in the way.

When i was in Kharagpur and Ranchi, the enthu for Pooja was so infectious:), all our neigbourhood used to be busy in shopping for new clothes, then give the dress to all their relatives., then from Shashtthi-sixth day, they used to be all decked up and go out to various programmes held in the city and then Pandal hopping:) what fun it was ! There Durga ma is brought home like a daughter,loved and feasted,celebrated and when she goes back, she is sent with lots of emotions, Sindoor( red color) khela, and evrybody feels really sad.

While in MP it was celebrations all the way, with Daandiya and Garba every where, and what used to amaze me that evryday around 10.30 pm in the main chowk, around 20-25 ladies and girls used to gather and do it, all decked up in colorful dresses and jwellery, looking gorgeous, and there used to be lots of spectators, but never saw any comments or teasing anything of that type. And one thing I really miss about Indore is there we could go out and eat even in our fasts, as in the markets everything is available with fasting ingredients like aloo tikki,Gulabjamun, namkeen, almost everything:) and same was there inNagpur. There we used to get some sort of leaves a symbol of friendship and on Dashmi(tenth day) people used to give them to their friends showing their friendship.

We worship the nine forms of Durga--

-shailputri,brahamcharini,chandrabhanta,kooshmanda,skandmata,katyayni,kaalratri,mahagauri,siddhidaatri

We do the fasting for 8 or 7 days as the case may be, according to Tithi.On the first day we sow the oats also. and then worship ma durga.Some people get the puja and paath done by Panditjee. For those days I dont even cook onion in my house.we eat only certain vegetables like Potato, colocascia, red pumkin and a particular flour and sago and rock salt only.

then on navmi, I make Pooris,Chola and halwa and call the girls...all young below 10 yrs and one boy is a must.on theses days....girls are considered an image of ma durga. so we felicitate them.worship them, we give them prasad and anything else whatever we want to.

The oats we sow are cut on Dashmi and used in Pooja and for tika to brother.

On dashmi--my mother used to make a big rangoli type and then put flowers and all that and then my father used to make new account books.and pens This day all the weapons u have are cleaned and put in the pooja. Today according to feng shui Fish is a symbol of prosperity, but in our house, even in those days, when none knew about feng shui.......many girls and boys used to come with fishes to show us and we used to give them money.

In south i have seen people putting many dolls and the festival is called Kolu,More than this I dont know anything, may be some of my blogger friends will enlighten me?

For me navraatri is not only about fasting......its for us to......remain pure for those days and follow the code of conduct for that

dont get angry

or irritated

no lies or cheating.

no bad thoughts at all

be kind to everybody

HAPPY NAVRAATRI TO YOU ALL !

shraadh

I saw a post on Shradh on hobo's blog and i wanted to write something.In indian calender a month is divided into two fortnights and except Amavasya and Poornima, rest of the days are named in the same way----first second,third fourth.one fortnight is called Krishna paksh and other shukl paksh. now-a-days.krishna paksh is going on, and this fortnight is devoted to shraadh.
Shradh is a ceremony where we remember our departed parents and grand parents (called pittr or poorvaj). we invite a Pandit and he does some pooja and sankalp and then we serve him the same variety of food liked by our dear ones and give him Dakshina.It is considered that the day our poorvaj died like on dooj, teej like that, in that tithi they visit us, and feel happy and satisfied when they see our love for them,and bless us.
Earlier traditionally nobody bought anything new or did any auspicious work in those days,but i think why not? they are our loved ones and they wud like us to be happy so.....
This day is a symbol of our Indian culture where we give respect and love to our departed souls also.and remember them with love.Its only our emotions which make it more meaningful.

PICTURES

These are the pictures of Ganpati we brought home,our environment friendly Ganesha, from fresh clay, the left picture is taken on the first day, and one on the top today, when we did the Visarjan.

GANPATI BAPPA MORYA! AB KE BARAS TU JALDI AA !

tomorrow is

http://images.google.co.in/url?q=http://nayna.in/blog/divine-grace/the-festival-of-ganesh-chaturthi/&usg=AFQjCNGBabPLf3tae-KnPWHH29yNNM8Jvg

tomorrow is Ganesh Chaturthi. When we were in maharashtra, so much of enthusiasm was ther for this festival. Every evening one hawker used to come, he would take the offerings for Ganpati and when the time comes for Visarjan, he will collect our Ganpati also. What a convenient way.

Then in Hyderabad also it is celebrated with lot of pomp and show. Even otherwise also i have seen that hyderabad celebrates most of the festivals with lots of enthu and that is missing here in Chennai, atleast i havent seen. No i think i am wrong, just now i went to the market to do the shopping for the festival. Its nearby Dandeeshwaram road, and there was so much of crowd that it was impossible to move:), I was happy to see. I bot some Doob( type of grass), then hangings made from the peelings of corncob, and a beautiful garland of very small flowers and of course Ganpati, but to be environment friendly, i bot the one made of fresh clay and with no colors.

My daughter also celebrates in a big way, making 21 things in the offering and gauri Pooja one day before. this photo of offerings I have shown is from her only This year My DH also wants to bring Ganpati home. Since after my surgery I am not going to the kitchen, I wont be cooking anything special, just we will bring ganpati and some sweets and do it.

Ganpati is the god who is always worshipped before worshipping any other god and he removes all the hurdles in life, thats why we call him Vighnharta. He idolised his mother and and was absolutely obedient to her and when his father was wrong, he didnt allow him inside, so it is said that----being good and obedient to ur parents, being righteous and kind to all is his real worship.and pleases him.

HAPPY GANESH CHATURTHY TO ALL OF YOU !

505

JANMASHTAMI

site:holidays.vgreets.com janmashtami--this photo has been taken from this site

Today is janmashtami. For us it is a big festival, as it is Birthday of lord krishna. Normally it is celebrated on two consecutive days and i celebrate the first one, as we were told by our elders that we belong to Mathurawaasi, Krishna took birth in mathura and then in the night he was transported to Gokul, so Gokulwaasi celebrate the next day.http://svabhava.blogspot.com/2007/09/janmashtami.html--this jhoola is in my daughter's home:)

In our childhood it used to be a big day. We all kids used to search for flowers and it used to be competition sort among all the kids of our Mohalla-who has the most flowers, and since this day everybody needed flowers to decorate,there used to be a big shortage and then we will decorate the Puja room, make the gate with sarees---what a charm it was, my mother never used to let us touch her sarees, so what we will is take any sari of our grand mom, most of the time the latest one--on her everything we had a birth right::)), then we will use all our little toys and everything.

My mother will be busy in the kitchen making sweets , those times she used to make lot of varieties like--panjeeri ( barfi ) of melon seeds, of dry fruits like almonds, chironji, goond and makhana, one with coconut,then pakoras, 2-3 curry vegetables, kheer (makhana), panchamrit and what not. it used to be sumptous feast. and my mother is a really great chef, I always say that u must patent few of ur dishes::)), all her neighbours and relatives always demand her sweets rather than any fancy sweets from the market.

In the evening we will go to see the temples,and they used to be so crowded and decorated-a sight to behold.

and then when clock struck 12 at night we shall do the pooja and all the rituals and eat. Though by that time we were so sleepy that normally we didnt take anything, we took eveything next day only.

I have lived in many states but i always got some of the ingredients if not all, but I am very surprised that since i came to Chennai, i am unable to find anything like MAKHAANA, KOOTO KA AATA YA SINGHADI KA. though nowadays one can find them even abroad.

So today i will have to make do with----fruit chaat, panchamrit,sabudana bada and vegetables.

HAPPY JANMASHTAMI !