Just now I read a post by Ankita about dress code by inlaws..how girls are not allowed to wear what they want or when they are allowed by inlaws they feel so grateful.
I was surprised that still there are families who think like that, because I have never asked my DIL to ever wear this or that, she wears what she wants and does what she wants, but she has never thought of that as if I am being liberal or she has got an advantage,So freedom is such that if you dont get it you crib it, but when you get it you dont value it, you take it for granted.Same is true for everything in life, whatever we get is never enough, we start pining for something else...
I feel that dressing sense should have some decorum . In our time wearing salwar kameej was also being modern, and after marriage, I felt shy wearing them whereas all my Sister inlaws and brother inlaws wanted to see me in them, I couldnt wear them then I wore only saree., till after 30 years of marriage, I wore only saree in front of relatives, they didnt say anything, it was I only who felt awkward.in other dresses...
Earlier my eldest bua use to feel shying without covering her head in front of father, whereas the yougest use to feel shy in covering her head.....this is the way time changes:)
But personally I wouldnt like my daughter to wear low neck dresses or showing legs in front of her inlaws, and if she does it would make me uncomfortable. a little bit...
I was surprised that still there are families who think like that, because I have never asked my DIL to ever wear this or that, she wears what she wants and does what she wants, but she has never thought of that as if I am being liberal or she has got an advantage,So freedom is such that if you dont get it you crib it, but when you get it you dont value it, you take it for granted.Same is true for everything in life, whatever we get is never enough, we start pining for something else...
I feel that dressing sense should have some decorum . In our time wearing salwar kameej was also being modern, and after marriage, I felt shy wearing them whereas all my Sister inlaws and brother inlaws wanted to see me in them, I couldnt wear them then I wore only saree., till after 30 years of marriage, I wore only saree in front of relatives, they didnt say anything, it was I only who felt awkward.in other dresses...
Earlier my eldest bua use to feel shying without covering her head in front of father, whereas the yougest use to feel shy in covering her head.....this is the way time changes:)
But personally I wouldnt like my daughter to wear low neck dresses or showing legs in front of her inlaws, and if she does it would make me uncomfortable. a little bit...
10 comments:
The dress code is a constant tussle and in a transforming society it will take time to accept new values:)
Jeans or Salwar Kameez or Saree - as long as they are decent, it is fine.
Rahul Bhatia: very true!
SG:exactly...smae thing I meant..
SG is right, any dress as long as it is decent. It depends on how one carries it.
Dress is a matter of personal choice but unfortunately in India a lot of people have the right to decide what we women wear!!
Everyone need a sense what to wear, when and where!
There was a time when MILs had nothing better to do than to nag the DILs.
Times have changed, now nobody has the time or the intention to nag anyone or be nagged by anyone.
I don't think the In Laws would object to anything unless it is really offensive, in these modern times.
Matter of culture, and decency that is( relative).
Sure there must be dress code for occasions and that code must be self determined . That will be possible only from what is valued as ethos.
Leaving aside the acrimony of religious identity and dress code that is forced upon by matters of faith, I feel a person must determine what he or she will be comfortable in and what would be appropriate for occasions and not being immodest.
Asha: I agree..
Meera Sundar Rajan:..Sometimes there is unwanted interference, but sometimes its valid too as some girls forget the place and surroundings while dressing..
Jeevan: yes and when they dont, people raise a voice..
Rama Ananth: exactly..who has the time and intention today..its only when something offenses the eyes that..
Anil: that would be ideal..but when people dont then?
As SG says, any dress which is decent is OK. It would be nice if women wear saree or salwar while visiting temples etc. Jeans won't suite for our type of weddings! They will be odd one out!
I started wearing salwars at 35 when I started learning yoga! But I never wore them at other times. Now, for the past 4-5 years, I started wearing them at home. It is easy for me to go for walks with my husband. Saree slows down the speed.
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