Politics

I feel very frustrated when some famous people say that politics and sports should be  kept separate or music and politics should be kept  separate. arent sports and music a part of our life and arent our soldiers a part of our life? If our hand is hurt our eyes cry, can we keep them separate and say dont feel hurt?Our soldiers are not killed, they are BEHEADED...shouldnt we  say in one voice.we shall not tolerate it?.Is it politics to feel for our fellow countrymen?...

How can people even think about AMAN KI AASHA  and SUR SHETRA with this back ground. We are considered weak if we think humane.War is not the answer and so is these culture exchanges..First we must make ourselves strong in all respects..internal, security and border security..and traitors should be punished, cleanse our own society, only then think about any cultural or otherwise exchanges.

SUPERSTAR INDIA

SUPERSTAR INDIA..Shobha De
It is about India, Indian people, their quirks, moralities, food everything. She has written and covered almost everything about our lives and since this book was written in 2008, situation has changed. She thought Mayawati and Hillary Clinton will be heads in their respective place but it didnt happen..She has hyped Vijay Mallya..look where is he now and same with Amar singh..India is changing at a higher speed than she could visualise.  The only thing that rankles me is that for the things she ridicules and in the same line she accepts that she also does the same.so if evolved people will also not make effort to change then how will it be done.
But the book is written in a fluid way and very interesting to read, I wanted to quote many sentences here, but I think it would be better if you read it..
worth it, try it

ENGLISH AUGUST..Upmanyu Chatterjee
I am puzzled why some writers are hyped so much..heard a lot about this book and there was a movie too but its totally boring, secondly the protagonist has no redeeming qualities..He is an IAS officer, but has no honesty of thoughts or deeds, uses obscene language, smokes drugs, shirks from his job and duties and fantasises about his friend's mother and another friend's kid daughter...I abhor such people..
not worth trying even.



MISTRESS OF SPICES...Chitra BanerjeeDivakaruni
This book has been made into a movie also starring Aishwarya Rai, though i can imagine her as mistress of spices. I havent seen the movie, but book is superb. Its a fantasy of the writer that there  is this occult art where one can learn to speak to spices and be guided by them and help a lot to others thru them, but as is usual there are certain restrictions to lead that life and one cant deviate from that line.
very interesting book, worth a read.


TELL ME YOU DREAMS..Sydney Sheldon.
Very usual Sydney sheldon, but interesting...

CONDOLENCES

It is normally seen that whenever there is a death in any family, visitors talk like this..

They didnt see a good doctor, otherwise this would havent happened..

Nobody cared much..

They could have taken the person to a big city for treatment..

I would like to ask whether the outsiders love the person more than the family?
Have they done anything for that person when he/she was alive?
Doesnt always the family do the best they can?
Who knows about families constraints and problems?
and last but not the least have you come here to be a support or give them more grief and regret?

People defeat the purpose of their visit by their suggestions and criticism, grieving family needs support in every way,nothing else, so try to give whatever you can but please no suggestions and no ifs and buts...

Appearance

Just as i wrote in my last post about the mind set of people who think that English speaking and smartly dressed people get more respect, yesterday one of my friend told me a real incident..

He went to bank for some work and was sitting there when he saw a man, dark complexioned(another of our prejudices), dressed in dhoti could speak only Tamil,he had a draft for 5000/..and he needed money immediately for her daughter's delivery. But the clerk over there didnt help him instead he said that you deposit in your account and you will get it after 2 days. But that man needed money that day only, he had the urgent need, her daughter was in hospital, he said that bank could deduct some charge and give him the amount..but nobody in the bank listened to him and offered any solution.So this friend of mine called him and asked the details and then told the officer over there that they could always buy the draft..there is a provision in bank.but they gave excuses like..we have to see the reputation of customer and all that..so he came in the form and asked them to chk the details..he was their customer for 8 years and none of his cheque had bounced so far..isnt it enough for a bank to help his  customer...whereas once a cheque they received for an IAS customer's account and there wasnt enough balance, but instead of bouncing it they called the person and cleared it..

So for them a person's financial status and appearance meant more than the dictum that customer is god and they must try to help the customer..

Of course in the end they gave him the money but only because of this friend of mine..

We need to change this mindset,everybody must help more to those who have less than those who have more..and a person must be respected for virtues not for possessions.

ENGLISH VINGLISH

I saw English Vinglish with so much expectations , but was disappointed, I think everybody knows the story, so I shall tell you what I noticed..

I never endorse the view that those who know English are better off and more intelligent, because English is only a language, they know one more language, nowhere it becomes equal to poise, confidence, styling , affection,intelligence, everything as if its a Alaadin ka chirag. Sreedevi is shown as clumsy,unappealing housewife who is brusque with her husband, never affectionate..and according to her nobody respects her..( I dont give much importance to her teenage daughter, because many children feel that way but if tackled properly they change, I feel that its her upbringing too which is at fault).

and then she learns English and suddenly she becomes a diva. smart(starts wearing trench coats instead of shawl), gets oodles of confidence, and people start respecting her..gets accolades from everyone( her husband always appreciates her cooking but that is not important to her)..

I have seen many women who dont know English but are respected by everyone in their family and outside.Respect is not for English language, its for the person..

Even her encounter with visa people and all are ridiculous, because translators are always provided to those who dont know English.
I never like the woman who encourage extra marital affections for trivial reasons, one has to be strong in the character everywhere...
Dont know why people liked sridevi in this role, I found her looking haggard and her mannerisms awkward..would have preferred some other actress may be Tabu. or Divya balan



Desirable Daughters..Bharati Mukherjee
Most of the Bengali writers write about NRI Bengali's and their life, this is also about them and their own community.sort of Ok only

Equal Music...Vikram Seth
I liked his Suitable boy,and ten two lives too, so thought of reading it, but it couldnt interest me at all, so much so that i couldnt read it even.

I got two books from Robert Ludlum..
1..Traveyane...its not like Ludlum at all..no action, no supense, just talking..

2...Janson Directive...again it looks like a very old story written in a very small font and dint find it interesting.

and now..

नया साल मंगलमय हो, सब के जीवन में समृद्धि, खुशहाली लाये 

हमारी  शुभकामनाएँ 

Mother

In all the relationships this the one which is the backbone of every relationship in life, because its mother only WHO moulds the personality of an individual into what he becomes when he is grown up, so if one tries to be a good and efficient mother, many other problems of future are solved.and since mothers are adulated so much, itys time they took the responsibility also for the wrong doing s of their wards..Nobody can be a good mother by just pampering and providing for all the whims of their children.Mothering means giving them a good foundation with good values..... Of course there is no fixed formula for that, and it depends on person to person and circumstances, still if few basic things are maintained lot of work is done

when the kids are young that is time to start their education for discipline and moral values and better if its done through practice. At this time we can make their foundations strong with our love and model behaviour. Children always imbibe their elders. Whatever is learned in the childhood, stays forever.Normal practice is to leave them free when they are young , thinking-bade ho kar sab seekh jaayenge , but its not like that, habits are formed in the beginning only.and love doesnt mean just giving ,its judicial giving and judicial withholding.And sometimes listening to a firm NO makes them resilient,teaches them acceptance of life, where they cant get everything ..

In the teen years, they need a friend and confidante,so try to be friendly,not a friend, because its necessary for the children to respect the parents,no matter what,this habit of respecting parents brings in them a lot of discipline in life.This is the time to teach them to be confidant, not to be in awe of peer pressure, tell them about the rights and wrongs in the life,and if there is any problem, then parents are the best people to solve that.Give them a confidence that they can share anything with you, their fears, their choices everything. Dont be judgemental.When the children are taught values from the beginning, they may come to some cross roads in life and may be in a dilemma, but be sure they will never deviate from the path of righteousness.Trust them. This is the most turbulent phase of their life support them, be like a rock behind them and see them grow into confident individual.

Then it is time for them to choose a profession, let them make a choice, dont choose it for them.Its their life and they should have every right to take its decision.Give them freedom, but tell them that freedom with itself brings lot of responsibilities.Tell them the pros and cons of everything but the final decision should be theirs.Life is not always a bed of roses, let them find it for themselves, they will respect and value everything more this way. The best gift parents can give to their children is ROOTS---that is unstinted support in their ventures and.... WINGS. freedom to do what they want, its not that o parents can teach only, sometimes they can learn a lot  also from them .Dont do everything for them, rather tell them how to do it..Parents who try to do everything for their lot, are not making their life comfortable, rather sowing a seed for lifelong dissatisfaction, because when they will not get the same treatment from others in life, they will never appreciate anyone and wont get any appreciation too,They will be miserable due to their dependency habit.

Last duty-for the parents, if you feel like that is -finding them a partner, here also if they choose themselves, accept it happily,believe that you have inculcated enough sense of propriety, and values, so hopefully they will not go wrong. or they will learn..

SHOBHA AT SIXTY..SHOBHA DEY

KALKI: SELECTED STORIES
 This is a translation from Tamil by Gowri Ramnarayan.The stories are from old era, written in the same way as Premchand wrote in Hindi.The situations at that time were very different and morals very high, but there were all sort of people too.But all stories tell us about some ideal.first is about girl education, where a girl lost the love of her life because she couldnt read, and so she studied  and devoted her life to girl's education.Then there is one about untouchability, child marriage etc.
Nice read.

SHOBHA AT SIXTY..SHOBHA DEY
Shobha dey writes in her style about life after sixty.Its a sort of management guide for woman written in a simple and interesting way.Some very simple solutions for complicated problems, though i am sceptical of them working.As is common with all the people who have everything, they say they like simple things and they work from them, cant believe how much of that is true and how much just to make an image. But some ideas are really good and workable too, so all in all a good read...