Showing posts from 2010


My last post created lot of confusion, as I didnt write it clearly,It was not about independent people but about those who are dependent  or live with their children so I want to say here now very categorically
I love the people who maintain themselves and live well and are active and live life well.I admire them.
I was talking about
this tendency of reminiscing about their youth and its flirtations, and exaggerating the importance they got from opposite sex:).......talking about which looks very ridiculous at this age..atleast to me.I can never talk to my children or even my sisters and tell them that i was so popular among boys etc etc, I find it embarrassing. and feel that they are not so important topics now, as life has much more to offer.

My second point was about the DEPENDENT older crowd that most of the people find old people's plight very pitiable and bad, but do old people make any effort to make life better for their young children.and most of the problems can be solv…


I have seen that most of the women when they cross 50 start thinking about their past and reminiscing about their youth. Now you are going to say that being nostalgic is so common to everybody, past always seems to be but here comes the catch:)..they remember more about the crushes, who were the boys after them(or they were after them?), how popular they were( even if nobody liked them:). And today if anybody wants to maintain friendship and if the person is from the opposite gender, then its their attraction which is still working.....some go to the length to exaggerate, how much they are liked in society and by others.

What is the thought process behind it? is it the fear of growing old? or growing unattractive? or some complex is growing inside of feeling unwanted?

I have always felt that appreciation and praise if any should come from others..blowing your own trumpet is so ..not very appealing ?
Secondly if people age gracefully and behave accordingly, neither they are…


Just the other day I saw an advertisement for Navy ball and decided to  go there.Whenever I see the people from forces, I stand in awe at their grooming..what discipline and style they have !!very admiring ! This function was so systematic When i heard that there would be around1000 people, I was apprehensive that may be there would we too much of crowd in a cramped place or may be a long queue for food, and ultimately food may be short too..and all that. But nothing of the sort. It was planned in a huge space where all the people were assigned a table and coupons were given for drinks and food. and no lines anywhere.
In the show for entertainment there were belly dancers from Russia and laser shows, both were very good. In the three laser shows best one was where they showed how this navy day came into existence.from 71 war...that time  Navy had helped the country get an awesome victory.
When I saw the girls who participated in the pageant , I realised how much work must be being do…

Can we do it?

In the response to my last post everyone said that it is best if one does what one likes, but is that really ever possible in life? I dont think so. Its not that we always want to do the right things, we may desire so many things, which may not be proper to do and if we do that may be we would be ruining all our relationships and then could we be happy after that.? Life cant be lived for a few moments of happiness.its along term thing.
It all reminded me that once my son gave me a card with the matter.......what can I give you.may be  Ican wish you to have. the freedom to do what you want , freedom to do as you want..I loved that card so much that I have treasured it for last 6 years. Because yes that freedom is the greatest thing, but even he cant give me that because if ever I do something which he or his wife dont like he is wont to ask how can you do it:)
I know we cant live life with complete abandon as we are social animals, but sometimes I feel that in a year .a month m…


I read about adjustment and Jugad at one fellow blogger's post and when I thought of adjustment, it reminded me a very old story I read long back may be 20 years back but even today one identify with is the synopsis of that...

Aparna was married to Shyam with lot of fan fare. Shyam was a very loving and caring husband and she was very happy with him.But his mother was a typical MIL who never wanted to leaver her hold on his son.So Shyam asked her to be polite and respectful to his mother whereas he will do everything otherwise to make her happy. WHenever Shyam went somewhere and brought 2 sarees for two most important women in his life, it was his mother who chose first and he then consoled Aparna saying..she is immature, but you are mature, let her take it, you can adjust, after all she is not going to be with us forever(though she outlived Shyam) and life went on. She had a son, who grew up to be a fine young man and a caring and loving son.
She married the son the wi…


Husband: aaj khane mein kya banaogi?..(.What will you cook today for dinner)
Wife: Jo aap kaho..whatevr you want
H: Dal chawal bana lo..make rice and lentil
W: Abhi kal hi to khaye the...but you ate them yesterday only
H: to sabji roti bana lo..then cook some vegetables
W: bacche nahi khayenge.....Kids dont eat that
H: to chhole puri bana lo..then cook  chhole poori
W: mujhe heavy heavy lagta hai..
H:  eggs bhurji bana lo...
W: aaj guruvaar hai..Today is thursday
H: paraanthe?
W: raat ko paraanthe kaun khata hai??..who eats parantha at night?
H: Hotel se mangwa lete hain?..then we can order from Hotel.
W: roz roz hotel ka nahi khana chahiye. hotel food shouldnt be eaten frequently.
H: kadhi chawal?
W: dahi nahi curd
H: idly sambar?
W: usme time lagega.pehle bolna chahiye tha na!!....its time should have told earlier.
H: Soup hi bana lo, …

Koffee with karan

Last week suddenly i had to make a trip to Hyderabad and what a pleasure it was so good over there and i realised that how much the mother tongue means to everyone. I felt so good that i could talk in Hindi and when I went to Fresh..lovely Hindi movie songs were being played, and I enjoyed so much that just loitered around.

Koffee with Karan season 3 has started and I watched a few episode and liked that new generation stars are not so diplomatic.When Deepika and Sonam put Ranbeer down for his sex appeal, so much noise was made, but when Ranbir and Imran put Sonam and Deepika last in acting and looking sexy , nobody batted an eye.I didnt understand why. But for Salman, stars are high now .a days, Dabang is the biggest grosser of all times and he is the top most search ( in Bollywood) at Google also  and then everybody  at KWK praised him and chose him most of the times over Sharukh.I am happy for that.

Now a days I am reading a book by Dr. Sunny Satin..Incerdibly believab…

India versus abroad

Recently a blogger friend sm wrote here a post about the advantages and disadvantages of coming back to India..initially I didnt agree but it made me think and here is what I think......

Advantages in living abroad.....

the biggest I find is money, Indian money has no value, there the same calibre person can earn enough to live well and still have expendable money, here even qualified well placed people also cant have that freedom with money..of course now things are changing as both the spouses are working here.Infrastructure and governance.there one doesnt have to run door to door for getting things done and then ultimately grease the palms.many people cite job satisfaction also, but I think politics is everywhere, may be here it is more.Less pollution.One doesnt have to look after day to day guests and other family responsibilities and as is the trend in India:) people living abroad get more respect and awe even from the relatives without doing anything, and so they are forgiven eve…

I AM SORRY......



THE "IF" Tag.....I have been away from the blog for long and for multiple reason, about them in my next post, I start again with this very unique tag..I was tagged by Starry long back, so here I am...

If I were a month.....It has to be February,the weather is so pleasant, that I always plan some vacation at that time.

If I were a day of the week....I would pick a sunday, as I love to have morning tea with leisure, which I cant otherwise, and this is the only day one can spend without any restrictions, as you want it.

If I were a time of day.... I am a morning person totally, I am always full of energy and waiting to do so many things....

If I were a season....It has to be autumn, with the foliage changing colors..nothing is so beautiful as the changing colors of nature.

If I were a planet...I  would like to be sun who always gives and brings sunshine in other's lives..

If I were a sea animal...I would be a fish who could fill someone's stomach.

If I were a direction....I wo…


I have an acquaintance who is very principled person and he was telling me that his son is also like him and cant tolerate indiscipline even, once he was standing in a queue and as is usual, another man tried to go ahead saying he was in a hurry.His son told him that all the people standing patiently in a queue are not without any work, they are also in a hurry, but following a discipline.That man was wearing good clothes and speaking English, so by his appearance a third person says that...see  even educated people behave like this his son said.......not educated, education brings a character in a person..( even oxford dictionary states this)..he may be literate, but we cant call him educated, and the other person was quite amazed and said so that he never ever thought like that, though this is the truth.And this incident reminded me of one of my post where I also said the same thing that in India anyone who speaks English, is considered educated well, even some may call him…


In the comment section Bikram wrote about his cousins calling him Veerji and listening to what he says..these are the values I think everybody must learn. In our times, I called all my sister.inlaws and brotherinlaws, even if they were younger to me with..didi and bhaiya and reason being that is the way to start learning to love and respect them. All my hubby's friends used to call me bhabhi.and in this there was lot of respect towards their friend's wife. Earlier everybody was given some relation like this because that way we could maintain a decorum in that relationship , but today people calling bhabhis are considered backward, as calling with names sounds cool..but then there is no boundary also, thats why one finds so many affairs etc.not that we didnt have them earlier, but still ..there was some hesitation. Today we want everybody to be it parent,inlaws others..but can friendship really replace all relations?..why do we want everyone to be friends only? dont…


Today I saw many pictures in the newspaper about children being initiated into is the tradition here but surprised to see that first alphabet being taught was A,I thought it would be their own.
NOW the biggest and most enjoyable festival is in the offing and it pleases me no end to see the ads in newspapers everyday..makes my day festive. This year Diwali is special to me as my son and DIL will be with me. When he was young I used to tell him, that stay wherever you want, but make it a point to come home on Diwali, but practically it is not possible.To me Diwali pooja is very auspicious and I would love it if I have my children with me, but due to the traditions I am unable to desire the presence of my daughter and just miss her all the time. Now a days when I am cleaning the home to welcome Lakshmi, I miss her so much,she  brings so much of pleasure with her presence, I feel so much at peace, and there is nothing impossible, if I am tired she will do it,..…


Craft Council Of India is running an exhibition of different things at Valluvar kottum..Chennai till 17th.I keep track of all handicraft exhibitions and make a point to see them and buy something from there.Its our duty to save our rich heritage, unless we  support them these ancient arts will vanish. And yesterdays outing was a complete delight.they had so many good things over there, so I bought  quite a few, instead of token things..bamboo mats,silk cushions, kota saree, venkatgiri suit material..directly from the weaver and some more material from jaipur.I urge you all whoa re in Chennai to atleast go there and see.
Yesterday we went to a very old Kali temple in Parry's..this Parry's was named after a company and today most of the people pronounce it as Paris:)..This temple is very old.some 500 years, it was on the beach,later on shifted here.It has certain divine feel, now-a-days Navraatri is going on and since me and my husband fast for 9 days, we want to so much to visi…


Recently our association has started a library in the premises and I have volunteered for their work as library is my favourite place.Earlier in early 80's also I was looking after a library and I read so many good and rare books there, then in next decade I ran my own library and now this. Just looks like god always takes care of our interests.

Here I came to know about a magazine..Frozen thoughts..I never saw it earlier, but this is an amazing one with unique ideas and very interesting too.First one i read, then I wanted  to quote so many things, then I thought that this way i would be quoting a full magazine.So i will share few thoughts which I liked...

First that why we keep our priorities vertically, why not horizontally, because few things in life are equally important, nothing more , nothing less. Like I keep getting mails saying that family is more important than career or job, but i dont agree with that.Its job only which keeps the family happy and one survives due to jo…


This sunday was daughters day...for the first time I came to know this through newspaper only.I dont believe in the days, but daughters sure are a blessings.I remember that earlier few of my friends had only daughters, so they used to envy me for my son, but today when all our children are settled, they are also living themselves and so are we.. as whether son or daughter, today everybody goes out for a job and parents always live by themselves. And in someways it is good too, as they get their freedom and looking at the girls today I think it wont be a merry ride living together.
I have never believed in the usual thinking that girls are more caring or sons are less, I think children are children and they love their parents equally, just their expressions are different. Secondly girls bring more affection and peace to family because their spouse are cool about it and  most of the girls parents also never want to rock their boat, but with boys it is not so.and then with SILs  one does…

Effects of marriage

AmritaTagged me  by asking :-
A question to all my blog buddies. You can answer anonymously, in case you`re uncomfortable. But do answer.

Has marriage killed the girl in you?
Are you more programed, more regulated in your thoughts and deeds?
Or are you simply calmer? Assuaged?
Are you still in love?
Or are you simply loving? Caring, fond and loyal..?

What does marriage do to you?

Since the journey of my marriage has been a long be precise 35 years,it will take me some real thought to think about it.....Has marriage changed me..yes in some ways, I was the one famous listener, and marriage to a totally same type of person turned me to become a talker:)...Otherwise our home would be a silent era. And in many other things I have grown as a person, since i got married very young, I was an impulsive,hyper ,rigid and righteous to the extent of being very adamant. To me everything was in black and white, grey never existed, now I think its most of the grey, I am still righteous, but ha…


This movie has generated so much of interest that it was a must for a movie addict like me to see it..asnd thats what I did:)..............................This is about two who cant pay loan to thebank, and when the bank decides to auction their land they go to a landlord for some loan. He makes fun of them and then one of his aid says that he has heard about a scheme of govt where govt sanctions one lakh ruppess to the farmer's family if he commits suicide.And when they are not able to find any respite from anywhere, elder brother manipulates younger one to do suicide..and from here the drama English channel people first deride rural news, then once they air, all others follow and be it channels, ministers or local politicians, everybody wants to get a mileage out of it, nobody is bothered either about farmers or the person's life,his family.Itas a great comment on our media, govt and police.
First half is very good, but second half just stretches,…


last week I went to meet one of my friend, she is a retired professor, but still keeps studying something,like social welfare etc. In the talks she told me that there had been a survey that rate of divorce is increasing in India by leaps and bounds.And in the discussions she says...Renu I have seen that all the relationships face some problems sometime or the other.But when young couple has some strife, men mostly keep it to themselves, and women, most of the time turn to their friends who are their peer group, in the same age group and facing the same problems sometimes and so their suggestions may not be very constructive or unbiased or even able to solve. Instead if they turn to someone senior who has been through that route and in the position to say.....been there done it, may be they can find some solace and some really good adviceand save the family.
This reminded me how young girls react to some little things even... are such a good cook, you are superb...
Or..You ar…

God Will not ask you......

God wont ask you what kind of car you drove. He will ask you how many people you drove who didnt have any transportation.God wont ask you the square footage of your house.He will ask you how many people you welcomed into your house.He wont ask you about the clothes you had in your closet. He will ask you how many people you helped to clothe.God will not ask you what your highest salary was. He will ask you if you compromised your character to get it.God wont ask you what your job was.He will ask you did you do it to your best and gave it your best.God wont ask you how many friends you had. He will ask you to how many people you were friend with.God wont ask you in which neighbourhood you liuved.He will ask you how you treated your neighbour.God wont ask you about the colour of your skin,He will ask you about the content of your character........So learn what is important.

My take on some movies...

Badmaash Company...I liked this movie main for its punchline..that if a person is intelligent and Sharp mind, then if he puts it in the right direction, then only he can lead a happy life...Otherwise he is doomed..sooner or later destiny will catch up with him..And then its quite entertaining also..Shahid as usual entertains and looks good, Anushka is Ok in acting, but lacks in looks.Veer and Chang are OK.Rest of the cast...Anupam kher..looks too old, Kiran Sippy and Pawan Malhotra just do their job.But all in all its entertaining.

My Name is Khan....This movie confirms that kajol is one of her kind, she just lights up the screen and I enjoyed those parts only where she is present, plus music is good.Why all retarded people are shown to walk with a stoop?

Well Done Abba:.very unique..with Hyderabdi back ground..this is a satire on our government, where even Babdis(ponds), can be stolen...this is a good movie and grows on you slowly..Boman Irani.everybody knows is good and so is Illa …

Tag from G and Hipgrandma

I was tagged by Hiphopgrandmom for seven unknown facts about me and kind of same thing by G and tag from g says.....

Here are the rules of the tag. 1) You have to tag 7 people. 2) You have to link their pages in your tag post 3) You have to leave a comment in their comments section telling them they've been tagged. 4) You have to say who tagged you.

I dont think till now there will be anything unknown about me to my friends, as i always write everything very frankly But still tag is a tag and to me its always a honour to do them  and so here I am:)
I have joined the maximum no. of hobby classes like..shorthand,typing,dance,hawaain guitar, enterpreneural course etc..some I completed and some left midway:)I am all the time observing and analysing the beahviour of all the people.if he did so why did he do it? and all that crap:)Though i look a very strong person, but i have been  exploited by my all sometime or other, as I am a emotional fool.hopefully now I have learnt a lesson.I ca…

Shall we judge?

Most of the time when I read  my blogger friends, I feel like saying so much in their comment section, but then I think instead of blocking their column, why not put your views on your own blog. So most of my posts are reactions..reaction to some news, reaction to other posts or someone's behaviour:)
As I was reading G, I realised that i have seen many people judging others on very trivial things...

If someone can speak English....he/ she is very intelligent ,way above in society and all that......But I have always disagreed because English is a language and it makes us multilingual to know it, and it has nothing to do with any other accomplishment.

Clothes...though it is said that clothes define a man, but i could say its only first impression, once you start knowing the person, clothes are immaterial...We dont care for anyone for the way he/she dresses, we love people for what they are inside.But many people give respect to dress also..initially without knowing the credentials i…


yesterday i saw the movie..Paathshala, and I didnt start with any expectation, but found it a good, clean, simple fun, and they have raised a very valid all the parents want to give their children schools with all the facilities,and comfort, whereas schools are not five star hotels,they are not meant for comforts and indulgence,but they are a place to learn, and they shape your personality by hard labour and discipline. And the main emphasis should be on academics but what is happening is that to encash this psychology of parents, people are commercialising a noble profession, they are making glitzy colleges and schools and squeezing the parents with high fees and other things and making money for themselves..its no more a  noble profession but a business.

Earlier there used to be uniform, so that all look the same, today i see that they are creating a divide at a student level only..there are AC and Non AC rooms and different types of even mess for the people who can pay…


Today is Teej,..first festival which heralds the season of festivals,this is  a festival of fun for women folk and I am missing my daughter and DIl..From my childhood, I used to get a new dress and new bangles and all of us sit together and apply henna on our hands on this day and then we will have get togethers, and enjoy the swing together.But the long working hours of women are making it difficult for them to  celebrate such festivals with full enthu...and I think with our generation, may be all traditional festivals will be gone and their place will be taken by valentines,Bdays,anniversaries etc.

Now is the time for freedom, freedom from family, freedom from everybody likes modern celebrations more than our traditional ones, because in these festivals we dont enjoy by eating out, rather it is considered inauspicious, if we dont cook anything in the house .Then most of the time everything is done in the morning and we eat only after pooja, so another restriction.Wh…

Everything Extra........

Today I was reading someone's blog where she had written how people give all stale and expired food to servants and it touched a chord somewhere in my heart. I have seen that in many families whatever small quantity of daals and veg is left after food is stored in the fridge. Then they will clean the fridge in a week and give it all to  servants, I feel why not give it when it is fresh?..So many people never think of their servants as human beings who have some self respect and dignity.....never serve them properly,we can serve multiple cups of tea to our relatives and even insist them to over eat, but when it comes to servants.....we will give them whatever is just not of any use,nevr give them properly even in a plate and katori...and think of themselves as great who are donating, but I never think of giving discard items as donation or even good deed..its rather opposite,....they are taking care of our garbage. Giving means what they want and need, not what we have in surplus.


Planning is an integral part of today's generation..They plan everything..marriage, career ,children, retirement everything, so much unlike us..people of our generation never thought much about married when parents decided,got children when god intervened and life went on. But recently on TV I saw the extremes of planning..there was this very big advertisement about funeral planning...I cant even imagine..I mean who plans for death and rituals and then they recommend it that your loved ones are saved the financial problems....I would say that if my loved ones are unable to do even my last rites, are they really my loved ones,then what about life insurance money? where that money will go..I would say..solicit life insurance policy, not this death planning.

Whenever we go to a restaurant here,the receptionist will always tell us more waiting time then actual,whereas in India, even if it will take one hour they will tell us..just 10 minutes sir, and then..ple…

Tagged by Amrita

Amrita  tagged me with a real special one. This is totally a different one, let me see whether I am able to do justice to this one......

1.A writeup on a kind gesture that someone had done for you which left you speechless
I am the sort of person who feels touched by little little gestures,I never think of big things.I am specially touched when they are done by strangers...So that way there are many incidents in my life..
Once  i was waiting at a bus stop in NOida and many buses came and went and I couldnt get in, then a young boy who was coming after playing badminton, stopped a bus and waited behind me till I boarded..that is one incidence I can never forget.
I ran a shop in Noida and there was this boy Shailesh who worked with me, and after leaving Noida , I got a letter from him (he couldnt even write well)..telling me to call him as he couldnt work with anyone else...I dont know why but most of my maids and servants have loved me so much that at times I feel overwhelmed.



I saw Rajneetilast week...Its a story of feuding families, dirty politics and betrayal. I read somewhere that characters are derived from mahabaharat, but I dont think so, because Arjun was nowhere like Ranbir and same can be said for Ajay devgan(karn) and comparing the Character of ArjunRampal with Yudhisthira would be blasphemy..they are so opposite, and Nana patekar as Krishna, totally wrong. Krishna cooperated for righteous, not for a family.

Ranbirkapoor has done a negative character with elan, whereas Katrina is effective in her looks,not acting.ArjunRampal is shown as a very cruel person who can do anything in the politics in a most gory style..its disgusting to see this family.

ManojBajpeyi( Duryodhan) doesnt come off any worse that Ranbir's family, so one feels sympathy for him and Ajay Devgan.

Movie is very fast and one is lost among so many characters,trying to identify the relations.Since it is fast paced, one doesnt get bored, but I liked Prakshjha'sApharan and Gang…


Sometimes i find the atmosphere here so now I am sitting here with total silence except a few birds chirping outside, its so soothing to the mind instead of hearing the noise of horns,shouts and specially the noise produced by maids working in the house. On the other side sometimes I find living in a carpeted house total pain, as one has to all the time worry about not spilling anything.....home should be a place where one can relax..even in attitude:)
And then Indian cooking...I always sound the smoke alarm,here I came to know an interesting thing that since here the walls are made of wood, they absorb the strong aromas of spices in Asian cuisine and so the homes get a different smell forever, and are down traded.
This time I travelled by Lufthansa and for the first time business class..I realised that in the long journey seat comfort is the only thing I look for,food part one can neglect, because nobody can provide Indian food better or even equal to air India and the…


image courtesy.......

How much I wanted to see this movie and I was kind of dissatisfied with the story.This movie is about a rich spoilt son of a hardworking self made man.And this boy changes when he falls in love, though he doesnt know it........what I liked....
Ranbirkappor..he is so cute and innocent looking and full of life
Konkona sen sharma....she is my favourite actress, though here she is not at her best.
ShikhaTalsania and NamitDas..both as friends of Ranbir are very good. also OK here, though normally I like him as he looks so dashing and suave.
In the songs I liked Man Bawra more than Iktara.

Now what didn'tgel with me....

Ranbir being so rude to his was so unbecoming.
Character of his mother played by not appealing at all, she looks pathetically gross and same for her character.
Ranbir .so young, just out of college and Konkona 27 year old..just didnt shouldnt be so blind.

I …

Lucky Tag

The Chinese tag which is supposed t o be I am bringing luck today by doing it:) was tagged by Chanz.....

8 TV shows/News Channels I like to watch

I am not a TV addict at all and just get irritated by soaps, where heroines are super girls, and men are good for nothing, and then every thing always go wrong:)..still I like comedy or movies or some talk shows
1. Sarabhai vs. Sarabhai


3.Jhoom India or something like this was there on Sahara..singing competition.

4.Full House

5.Boy meets the world

6.Koffee with Karan


8.Everybody Loves Raymond

8 Places to eat and dine...

I always try new places everywhere, now let me see what I can remember.....

1..Raintree..chennai.(eco hotel)


3.Copper & Chimney

4.Cafe Tapas

5.Green Park.Vadapalani.


7.Hyatt and Kanishka Delhi

8.There was this one very good hotel in Nagpur , I just cant remember the name, so instead of that I will say...Ohri's at Hyderabad Central

8Things I Look Forward To

1..I am looki…