What is in a name.. a lot, but what is a hot discussion now.a.days is that....... changing of surname after marriage. One girl says she doesnt want to change her name, its her identity and what she has been for last so many year:) and all the girls flock to her comment section declaring...me too, me too:)..
Is the surname our identity? or our identity is limited to our surnames only? For a woman of substance her identity is..
Her qualifications.......when we see a doctor, do we ever bother about what her surname is?
her deeds.........any good person is loved and appreciated who cares for her surname.
I dont write my surname on my blog, does that mean I have no identity? Most of my blogger friends tell me that i am a traditional person with values intact....How do they know? maine to surname laga nahi rakha:), its thru my views only.
This changing of surname after marriage is just conforming to the system made to facilitate many things in life, just imagine a scenario where... ( Rohini --a blogger on whose blog I read this discussion)also wondered about this though)
Amit goel marries Leena chopra
after marriage she becomes Leena chopra goel and suppose she is a firebrand feminist then she would like her children to be called.......that
and then these children marry the progeny of another feminist...Rita bhatia gupta, so now the children will be called.......................too long to write:) even. Why we are putting our children to so much of funny ideas and complications.
Changing the surname and following the culture and traditions of inlaws( imagine a scenario where a girl comes into the family, and the family has been celebrating a festival for last 40 years in a certain traditional way, now the girl wants it to be celebrated her parent's way also, now what will happen...
If two ways are followed, any traditon is diluted, rather its not a tradition at all,and creates a confusion or
if she wants to do it her way..will she and other family memebers go their own way? and the boy who has been doing it his mother's way so far will now be in a dilemma, living in same house its not possible to celebrate it separately.) is not a domination by anybody over anybody--its just to save the confusion in life, for the family to be homogenous..all with the same surname....A family of
Leena chopra wife
and children.....gGupta chopra doesnt look like a family even.
I just dont under stand from where all this ego is coming...I, my identity.
Everybody knows Kiran Bedi..she has an identity of a strong woman.surname changed or not nobody knows or wants to know.
Indira Gandhi...Did she loose her identity even after changing herself to Gandhi, she was a person par excellence and she remains that.
I can give you hundred examples where women have shone and created a niche identity for themselves, without bothering about this surname business. All these dilemmas are created by western thinking where family means only husband wife and children, but even then abroad also they take the name of husband.
Yes names are important, not surnames. I never put surname with my daughter's name, because before marriage one lives only one fourth of life, major part is lived after marriage only, and I didnt want her to have any hassles of changing the surname. I dont know why people want to live a life of denial, like denying all the things which are important after marriage or for grown ups.
Childhood is a foundation on which the building of life is constructed. Foundation is best in the ground, then only the building will be strong. A tree has roots which give it support to stand but they always remain buried in the ground, its only the leaves are visible,it cant live without roots but cant have any fruits without shoots(leaves)
Change is the only thing in life which is constant and necessary for growth. Men and woman are not adversaries but compliment each other beautifully, no one is complete without the other,we need them as much as they need us, it should never be we versus them, but only you and me= we, as sometime back someone wrote on my blog...life is not about looking at each other only but looking in the same direction TOGETHER.