Thursday, October 4, 2012

Loving and Living together...

Everyone thinks that if we live with the people we love, life would be a bliss, But it is not always so. There is a big difference in loving and living together.

I am not saying it in context to spouses only...Normally it looks like if we love someone, living together would be right, enjoyable and fun. But in my opinion its not always so.one may love so many people, and some a lot,but  living with them 24 hours..may be still difficult.... Because love comes from heart , but living together needs different type of synchronisation, similarities and adjustments.and practicality.

Living together and in harmony needs a lot of practical compromises, sharing of space,finances privacy and work.and lot of etiquette.. and as everything in life it has its own pros and cons, but there are more pros.....
It makes one a better human being, brings more patience in a person and makes you care for others....sometimes more than yourself.



23 comments:

Sandhya said...

I agree with you 100%, Renu!

Irfanuddin said...

i totally agree with what you say here.....
one has to make lot of adjustments n sacrifices to maintain those relations while living together.

chitra said...

Very true..Renu. Living together needs lot of adjustments and if mixed with love it becomes meaningful and lovely.

SG said...

You are correct. Too close is not good for comfort.

Harman said...

true,,
I live in joint family in US (more then 10 yrs)shared everything and still happy,,
its basically when you keep your egos aside and take in-laws as parents,, then they keep you as your daughters,
24/7 .. sharing is not impossible
its jus matter of your upbringing ..

Found In Folsom said...

Yes Renu..both are different..you could love a person to death yet you cannot live with them 24/7..You may live with a person, yet you may not be able to love the 100%.

Zephyr said...

Very true, Renu. Living together involves a lot of sacrifice, adjustment and love. But the sad truth is that the compromises sometimes have to be one-sided, which puts a lot of strain on the interactions. The pros indeed are more in terms of companionship, togetherness and of course oodles of love.

Rahul Aggarwal said...

but i do not understand one thing, how will i share space with someone if i do not love/like him .. that's the foremost and necessary step to stay together unless you are in a pg or in a hostel...yaa fir saas bahu types...!

Rahul Bhatia said...

True, one learns to adjust while living together

Chatty Wren said...

Very well said, Renuji! Living together is more difficult than merely loving somebody but going back to your own place at the end of the day:)

Bikramjit said...

well Loving and living together are TWO different scenarios

what you say is right


Bikram's

manjujoglekar said...

Yes, this is something to think about. We may love someone but find it difficult to live with them.

Living in harmony together necessitates compronises- not everyone can make them...

manjujoglekar said...

Sorry for typo in my earlier comment- I meant 'compromises'. :)

Renu said...

Sandhya: Thanks Sandhya!!

Irfanuddin:yes and sometimes they are not even acknowledged by the other party.

Chitra:Yes if its done, then there is nothing like that.

SG:not everybody can share the space and all other things.

Harman: I wish people could understand that...living with inlaws need some understanding and respect for them...

Found in Folsom:Thats true..sometimes you like a person , though you dont love the same 100%..

Zephyr: this one sided adjustment is breaking the families..it has to be from everybody..

Rahul Aggarwal:its not like that..sometimes you dont love the person so much,but you may have loved earlier, or you still like..but yes otherwise one cant live together..

Rahul Bhatia: some learn, but some dont want to and make life difficult for everyone else.

Chatty Wren: yes, because today we have become very individualistic.

Bikram: Thanks Bikram!

Manju: typos hardly matter, I always make lots of them:)..today compromise and adjustment have become bad words.

Shalom said...

Somehow this post reminded me of a talk in church years ago when I was a teenager. It was a counselling session by a priest about love, and he distinguished between love and affection / attraction. He said love is not a feeling. Love is characterized by 3 things:
1) It is a conscious decision
2) It is a responsibility i.e. both partners are responsible for & accountable to each other.
3) It is a commitment that should last a lifetime, not change as per whatever you're feeling at the moment.

Ash said...

hi aunty :) long long time... good to visit your blog again!

i love being with people, the more the merrier... it is such a joy, when everyone gives some and takes some... unfortunately, imbalances tend to take place more often than not, when one gives more than the other... conflicts and disharmony when living together is not the fault of family structures or setups, but the fault of people... people who can't give some and take some, both... unfortunately, it happens more often than not :( even if you want to give and be good, many times others usually don't let that happen.

Renu said...

Shalom:what the priest said is very important, specially the last point...

ASh: where were you?..missed you..

what you are saying is so true, but to remedy it we have to remain true to ourselves..if we are good, then we must not change ourselves, due to other's reactions.

Ash said...

True, that. I've been so busy at work aunty, really missed being in the blogosphere... well, now i'm back!!! :)

Dilip said...

I entirely agree - patience, understanding and care are the key!

Happy Kitten said...

Very true Renu... living together needs lots of sacrifice, understanding and mutual respect if this living is to be happy and bearable. Else one can live together and be in hell :)

Dilip said...

Caring and patience are two virtues that make real Love possible!

Renu said...

ASh; Happy to see you back:)

Dilip: but its a tall order to have them in today's times.

Happy kitten: thats the reason most of the families face hell more:)

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